Romans 12:9-19 Revised Standard Version
Marks of the True Christian
9 Let love be genuine; hate what is evil, hold fast to what is good; 10 love one another with brotherly affection; outdo one another in showing honor. 11 Never flag in zeal, be aglow with the Spirit, serve the Lord. 12 Rejoice in your hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer. 13 Contribute to the needs of the saints, practice hospitality.
14 Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse them. 15 Rejoice with those who rejoice, weep with those who weep. 16 Live in harmony with one another; do not be haughty, but associate with the lowly;[a] never be conceited. 17 Repay no one evil for evil, but take thought for what is noble in the sight of all. 18 If possible, so far as it depends upon you, live peaceably with all. 19 Beloved, never avenge yourselves, but leave it[b] to the wrath of God; for it is written, “Vengeance is mine, I will repay, says the Lord.”
Word of God for the Children of God
Glory be to the Father,
and to the Son, and to the Holy Ghost;
as it was in the beginning,
is now, and ever shall be,
world without end. Amen, amen.
What does Fake it till you make it mean?
“Fake it till you make it” (or “Fake it until you make it”) is an aphorism that suggests;
by imitating confidence, competence, and an optimistic mindset, a person can realize those qualities in their real life and achieve the results they seek.
What’s another way of saying Fake it till you make it?
Face it until you ace it.
All it takes is swapping just one letter — the “k” for the “c” — to get face and we have a similar concept revamped to include integrity.
Instead of faking your way through a challenging situation until you eventually figure it out, if you figure it out. Instead face it head-on with truth and honesty.
Relationships are hard.
As humans, we are sometimes embroiled in some sort of conflict.
It may be difficult to navigate relationships, but Scripture offers a powerful way to handle conflict.
In addition to Matthew 18:15-20, Romans 12:18 tells us to be peacemakers in people’s lives.
Matthew 18:15-20 The Message
15-17 “If a fellow believer hurts you, go and tell him—work it out between the two of you. If he listens, you’ve made a friend. If he won’t listen, take one or two others along so that the presence of witnesses will keep things honest, and try again. If he still won’t listen, tell the church. If he won’t listen to the church, you’ll have to start over from scratch, confront him with the need for repentance, and offer again God’s forgiving love.
18-20 “Take this most seriously: A yes on earth is yes in heaven; a no on earth is no in heaven. What you say to one another is eternal. I mean this. When two of you get together on anything at all on earth and make a prayer of it, my Father in heaven goes into action. And when two or three of you are together because of me, you can be sure that I’ll be there.”
Romans 12:18 reads: “If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.”
If you are stuck in a relationship marked by conflict and do not know what to do, Romans 12:18 is an excellent way not only to resolve that conflict but also to be a peacemaker in a world rife with conflict.
Because we live in a media-advanced age, people scroll through their social media feeds and feel free to comment on whatever is on their minds.
This easily breeds dissension and strife as people get into heated debates over cultural topics plaguing us today.
But there are ways to live out Romans 12:18 in our lives.
By taking practical steps to resolve conflict, you can live out Romans 12:18.
This will help us to not only for resolving conflict when necessary but also be peacemakers where appropriate.
Here are some ways to live out Romans 12:18:
Own Your Part
The most important thing you can do when resolving conflict and striving to be a peacemaker is to search your own heart.
Discover how you may be at fault.
Even if you are 50% right in this situation, you may not have delivered that information with the gentleness and respect that is owed to the other person.
For this alone, you need to apologize.
If you are in a strained relationship, be the person who reaches out to someone and takes responsibility for your part.
Even if you feel you are owed an apology, apologize for the way he delivered the information.
Let them know that your intention was not to hurt them, but to communicate your feelings in that situation.
It takes two to be in conflict.
What part do you have to own in this situation?
The quickest way to continue the conflict, even damage several relationships is to shift the blame to the other person and pretend it’s 100% their fault alone. Do what you can to take ownership and start the conversation with an apology.
Use I Statements
Even if the person in conflict doesn’t receive your information well, it is appropriate to use I statements.
Every person in the relationship should be allowed to express themselves clearly and consistently.
This means identifying emotions that may be associated with the conflict.
For example, if the person has said something harsh to you, identify the anger, fear, or sadness surrounding your feelings regarding the issue.
Don’t finger-point and say, “You made me feel…” or “You made me do this.”
That type of language only accelerates emotions and exacerbates an already difficult situation.
Instead, tell them, “I felt ____________ when you said__________.”
This allows you both to pinpoint the issue directly, identify your own emotions, and let the other person know where they may be at fault.
Sometimes people don’t always know where they are at fault.
It takes a strong person like yourself to recognize that for them, so they can continue the relationship healthily.
Work on a Solution
Many people talk things out, but they never reach a real solution—effective conflict resolution yields action steps for each party to take moving forward.
For example, if a person irritates you by engaging in a particular behavior, develop some action steps to address it.
If you want them to do chores regularly, work out a schedule so they do their part while you do yours.
Designate times or days for these chores to be completed.
This way, it honors both parties and their schedules.
If, for some reason, the person can’t complete their tasks on time as you both agreed to do, come back and resolve the situation.
Identify the parts that are not working and rework them together to achieve a workable alternative solution.
Just because you found one solution does not mean you can’t renegotiate later.
Sometimes, variables like a change in schedule or additional responsibilities leave you without time to complete your housework.
The best situation for a peacemaker is not to ignore it, but to sit down and have another talk.
Reiterate that the importance of housework must be done, but it’s clear that the schedule that has been established is not working. Rework the situation until you can determine the best way to achieve the desired outcome for both parties.
When you choose to include people in these situations, they can not only feel heard and seen but also valued.
Additionally, by working out a solution that works best for them, you are not only getting what you want, but they are also not making any excuses which would hinder them from completing the work as assigned.
Talk Privately
Take Time to Be Holy William D. Longstaff, 1822-1894
1. Take time to be holy,
speak oft with thy Lord;
abide in him always,
and feed on his word.
Make friends of God’s children,
help those who are weak,
forgetting in nothing
his blessing to seek.
2. Take time to be holy,
the world rushes on;
spend much time in secret
with Jesus alone.
By looking to Jesus,
like him thou shalt be;
thy friends in thy conduct
his likeness shall see.
3. Take time to be holy,
let him be thy guide,
and run not before him,
whatever betide.
In joy or in sorrow,
still follow the Lord,
and, looking to Jesus,
still trust in his word.
4. Take time to be holy,
be calm in thy soul,
each thought and each motive
beneath his control.
Thus led by his spirit
to fountains of love,
thou soon shalt be fitted
for service above.
1 Peter 1:13-16 Amplified Bible
13 So prepare your minds for action, be completely sober [in spirit—steadfast, self-disciplined, spiritually and morally alert], fix your hope completely on the grace [of God] that is coming to you when Jesus Christ is revealed. 14 [Live] as obedient children [of God]; do not be conformed to the evil desires which governed you in your ignorance [before you knew the requirements and transforming power of the good news regarding salvation]. 15 But like the Holy One who called you, be holy yourselves in all your conduct [be set apart from the world by your godly character and moral courage]; 16 because it is written, “You shall be holy (set apart), for I am holy.”
It is essential that if you have a grudge or issue with someone, you don’t take the easy way out and triangulate others into your situation.
The most common thing people do is talk about someone rather than to someone.
They often go to their friends and vent about the problem and how they feel hurt, betrayed, etc.
They never talk to the person they have a grudge with directly, and the situation is never sufficiently resolved.
This robs both parties of having a peaceful, healthy relationship.
Gossip and slander never get you your desired outcome.
Avoid gossiping to others.
Even if it may feel good in the short term, it harms relationships in the long term.
Matthew 18 is clear: if someone has offended you, go to them directly and express it.
You must confront them privately the first time.
This not only allows them to hear from you about the problem but also spares them any shame or guilt associated with the behavior.
By loving someone, it is essential not to bring two people with you unless the person is clearly in abject denial about their problem in this situation.
If, however, the person wont listen, take two other people who know about the situation and are not biased against that person through their behavior.
Allow one of those people to act as a mediator between the two parties.
Allow each person to speak frankly and honestly about the situation.
Then, allow the other person to speak.
Both people should listen to each other without interruption or explanation of the problem.
At the end, allow someone to mediate a reasonable solution between the two parties.
This is a great way to make peace between the two people while allowing each person to be heard, work out solutions which guides them to desired outcome.
Everywhere we turn, chaos abounds.
From the moment we turn on the news to the moment we shut off our social media feeds, we are bombarded with conflict, strife, and chaos.
God, who is a peacemaker, asked us to be peacemakers.
By utilizing the peace-making statement outlined in Romans 12:18, both parties can be peacemakers in a tumultuous world.
“Let love be genuine. Abhor what is evil; hold fast to what is good.” (Romans 12:9)
It’s a short verse that cuts deep.
In a world where “love” is far too often reduced to empty words and fleeting emotions, “love” can mean both everything and nothing at the same time.
But the kind of love Paul calls Christians to isn’t shallow or self-serving.
It’s genuine, costly, and rooted in truth.
1 Corinthians 13:4-8 Amplified Bible
4 Love endures with patience and serenity, love is kind and thoughtful, and is not jealous or envious; love does not brag and is not proud or arrogant. 5 It is not rude; it is not self-seeking, it is not provoked [nor overly sensitive and easily angered]; it does not take into account a wrong endured. 6 It does not rejoice at injustice, but rejoices with the truth [when right and truth prevail]. 7 Love bears all things [regardless of what comes], believes all things [looking for the best in each one], hopes all things [remaining steadfast during difficult times], endures all things [without weakening]. 8 Love never fails [it never fades nor ends].
Love That’s More Than Words
Paul’s first command is clear: “Let love be genuine.” The word genuine (ἀνυπόκριτος) means “without hypocrisy.” In other words, real love doesn’t wear a mask. It’s not fake or performative, like an actor reading lines; appearing to be polite but different when the mask is off.
Jesus showed us what genuine love looks like. He didn’t just tell people He loved them—He fed the hungry, wept with the grieving, touched the untouchable, and ultimately laid down His life for sinners. Jesus’ love wasn’t theoretical–it was real, tangible, and sacrificial.
This is the love we are called to. A love that moves beyond convenience, forgiving when it would be easier to hold a grudge; and serving when we’d rather sit back. A love that keeps showing up, even when we’re tired.
Love That Clings to Good
In the second half of the verse, Paul adds: “Abhor what is evil; hold fast to what is good.” That may seem like an abrupt shift, but it’s not. Real love isn’t blind. It doesn’t pretend that sin doesn’t matter, affirming that “everything is ok.”
True, Christlike love means we hate what destroys people. If we love our brothers and sisters, we don’t turn a blind eye when they’re walking into danger. We don’t celebrate what God calls sin. Instead, we cling to what is good. We hold on to truth, anchoring ourselves in God’s Word.
And that is certainly not easy. Some think that love and truth are at odds, but in Christ, they go hand in hand. To love more and more, we must love with both compassion and conviction.
11 When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child; when I became a man, I did away with childish things. 12 For now [in this time of imperfection] we see in a mirror dimly [a blurred reflection, a riddle, an enigma], but then [when the time of perfection comes we will see reality] face to face. Now I know in part [just in fragments], but then I will know fully, just as I have been fully known [by God]. 13 And now there remain: faith [abiding trust in God and His promises], hope [confident expectation of eternal salvation], love [unselfish love for others growing out of God’s love for me], these three [the choicest graces]; but the greatest of these is love. 1 Corinthians 13:11-13 Amplified Bible
How Can I Love More?
So here’s the challenge this and coming future generations of Christians …
How can we love more?
More sincerely?
More selflessly?
More like Jesus?
Loving more and more isn’t about doing more and trying harder.
It’s about abiding in Christ
—letting His love fill us, transform us, and flow through us.
Psalm 139:23-24 Amplified Bible
23
Search me [thoroughly], O God, and know my heart;
Test me and know my anxious thoughts;
24
And see if there is any wicked or hurtful way in me,
And lead me in the everlasting way.
It’s about surrendering our pride, confessing our selfishness, and praying the Holy Spirit, whether we like it or not, to soften our hearts and open our hands.
The mark of the Christian is love.
Let’s commit to being a church that bears this mark by real, Christlike love.
A love that is indelibly authentic, refusing to compromise on truth.
Love which keeps growing outward, until the world sees, the living Jesus in us.
In the Name of the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit ….
Praying ….
Psalm 16 Amplified Bible
The Lord, the Psalmist’s Portion in Life and Deliverer in Death.
A [a]Mikhtam of David [probably intended to record memorable thoughts].
16 Keep and protect me, O God, for in You I have placed my trust and found refuge.
2
I said to the Lord, “You are my Lord;
I have no good besides You.”
3
As for the saints (godly people) who are in the land,
They are the majestic and the noble and the excellent ones in whom is all my delight.
4
The sorrows [pain and suffering] of those who have chosen another god will be multiplied [because of their idolatry];
I will not pour out their drink offerings of blood,
Nor will I take their names upon my lips.
5
The Lord is the portion of my inheritance, my cup [He is all I need];
You support my lot.
6
The [boundary] lines [of the land] have fallen for me in pleasant places;
Indeed, my heritage is beautiful to me.
7
I will bless the Lord who has counseled me;
Indeed, my heart (mind) instructs me in the night.
8
I have set the Lord continually before me;
Because He is at my right hand, I will not be shaken.
9
Therefore my heart is glad and my glory [my innermost self] rejoices;
My body too will dwell [confidently] in safety,
10
For You will not abandon me to Sheol (the nether world, the place of the dead),
Nor will You allow Your Holy One to undergo decay.
11
You will show me the path of life;
In Your presence is fullness of joy;
In Your right hand there are pleasures forevermore.
Glory be to the Father,
and to the Son, and to the Holy Ghost;
as it was in the beginning,
is now, and ever shall be,
world without end. Amen, amen.
Loving God, Living God, Loving Hope, Living Hope, Loving Living Life His Way! "Many things are possible for the person who has hope. Even more is possible for the person who has faith. And still more is possible for the person who knows how to love. But everything is possible for the person who practices all three virtues." - Brother Lawrence (1605-1691), Practicing the Presence of God (1692). 