For how long, O LORD shall I take counsel in my soul? Are We Being Too Hard on Ourselves, or Taking Ourselves Too Seriously? Psalm 13:2

Psalm 13 Amplified Bible

Prayer for Help in Trouble.

To the Chief Musician. A Psalm of David.

13 How long, O Lord? Will You forget me forever?
How long will You hide Your face from me?

How long must I take counsel in my soul,
Having sorrow in my heart day after day?
How long will my enemy exalt himself and triumph over me?


Consider and answer me, O Lord my God;
Give light (life) to my eyes, or I will sleep the sleep of death,

And my enemy will say, “I have overcome him,”
And my adversaries will rejoice when I am shaken.


But I have trusted and relied on and been confident in Your lovingkindness and faithfulness;
My heart shall rejoice and delight in Your salvation.

I will sing to the Lord,
Because He has dealt bountifully with me.

The Word of God for the Children of God.

Glory be to the Father,
and to the Son, and to the Holy Ghost;
as it was in the beginning,
is now, and ever shall be,
world without end. Amen, amen.

Being too hard on yourself can cause immense pressure and toxic stress.

Of course, not all stress is bad.

Stress can be good for you, but when you put pressure on yourself to live up to certain expectations and you don’t, this stress can become toxic, affecting your mental and physical and spiritual wellbeing.

It creates confusion and uses up your energy resources, throwing off your balance, much like putting too much pressure on an object can throw it off balance. 

Pressure is a force, and if you are going to apply force in any direction, why are you applying directing it against yourself? Why not apply it in positive, uplifting direction? Why not make a .001% extra effort to turn this pressure around into your biggest fan, encouraging, instead of discouraging, your every step?  

To do this, recognize the need for change, it is important to recognize the main signs you are putting too much pressure on yourself, what to do about them: 

1. “I Didn’t Get ‘X’ Done.”

Often, we tend to focus on what we haven’t done instead of what we have accomplished, then get stuck feeling guilty, frustrated, edgy, and like a failure.

When you feel yourself falling into this way of thinking, stop and say or write down what you have done. Remind yourself of what you have achieved, and that there will be time to get the rest done tomorrow. 

2. “I Have to Have it All Together.”

So many of us feel like we must have it all together all the time, but this denies our humanity and the fact that we all make mistakes, mess up and get things wrong at times.

When you feel like this, remind yourself that no one has it all together.

And try not to compare your life to what others are doing, because the way you think and act, and your experiences, make you completely and utterly unique!

You will never be able to be anyone else but you, and you are amazing, and even unique, however, even if you are not uniquely perfect all the time. No one is!

3. “I Must Succeed.” 

It is easy to fall into the trap of thinking we must always succeed at something or achieve something to be worthy of attention. When you feel like this, remind yourself that God defines your own success based on His Standard, not yours!

God alone knows there is always something you can do that no one else can do. 

4. “I Cannot Make a Mistake.”

Even though we all make mistakes, it is easy to think we shouldn’t mess up and we need to get things right all the time.

But it is critically important to recognize our failures are often as important as our successes, and teach us important life lessons that help us grow as a person.

So, next time you start beating yourself up over a mistake or two, ask yourself what this experience has just taught you and to focus on how you have grown. 

5. “I Let Everyone Down.”

Sometimes, it is easy to feel like we always let people down and like we are just failures. Here, it is important to remind yourself that we all fail at times, that your failures help you grow, and that, at the end of the day, life is unpredictable.

We can’t always control everything to make sure things turn out well, because so much of life is out of our control. Also, remind yourself that trying your best is the only way forward, even when it doesn’t work, meet the minimal standard of your own definition of success, because you will learn and grow as a person.

6. “I Feel Exhausted All the Time.” 

We often take on so much and expect ourselves to do so much that we quickly find ourselves stressed out, overwhelmed and full blown full bone exhausted.

If this sounds like you, do a lifestyle check, and ask yourself: 

  • Do I take enough breaks to recharge?
  • Do I give my brain and body time to rest and reset?
  • Am I having enough fun?
  • Do I take time to take care of my mental and physical health? 

See what you can change in your life to give yourself the time you need to rest! This is so vitally important for your mind, brain and body and spiritual health. 

7. “I Can Hardly Smile Anymore.”

It is too easy for humanity to get into a pattern of living where we are so laser focused on what needs to get done that we forget how to enjoy life, which can have an impact on our wellbeing.

If you find yourself smiling less and forgetting why you are working yourself so hard, take a step back, pick up a bible and pray upon ways to enjoy life again.

Watch something funny, spend time with a loved one, or do something that makes you smile again! You can even deliberately schedule this anywhere into your day so you don’t forget to give yourself a break, take the time to enjoy life.

8. “I Need to Do Everything Perfect All the Time.”

If you find yourself emotionally “holding onto” “bear hugging” the mistakes you’ve made, noticing more of the finite details of what, where, why, how you have done wrong than what you’ve gotten right, and getting anxious when you do a good-but-not-so perfect job, you may have fallen into the perfectionism trap, where you can’t come to accepting all your weakness’ or anyone else’s.

If this sounds a little too much like you, take the time to notice when you do this, and remind yourself that there is a difference between wanting to achieve certain things and thinking you need to do everything perfect all the time.

Remind yourself that mistakes and learning are a necessary part of life, and that you can work hard and harder, if you take some breaks, set up self-boundaries.

And, when you find yourself spinning into outer space, thinking more and more about what you got wrong, remind yourself of what you have gotten right too!

9. “I Am Not Good Enough.” 

Take the time to observe and analyze your internal conversations and dialogue.

How do you speak to yourself?

How do you think of yourself?

If you are using a lot of negative, pessimistic language to describe yourself, take the time to work on the way you think about yourself.

Consciously observe and write down your critical self-talk and how often it’s happening. Then, work on creating re-conceptualized statements to counter this negative way of thinking and change the way you speak to yourself.

For example, change

“I wish I could be as good as…” to “I will never be able to live up to someone else’s example of success because I am unique and define my own success.”

This will take time to become a habit, so make sure to practice it every day! 

The Happiness of Abundant Life

John 10:11-18 Amplified Bible

11 [a]I am the Good Shepherd. The Good Shepherd [b]lays down His [own] life for the sheep. 12 But the hired man [who merely serves for wages], who is neither the shepherd nor the owner of the sheep, when he sees the wolf coming, deserts the flock and runs away; and the wolf snatches the sheep and scatters them. 13  The man runs because he is a hired hand [who serves only for wages] and is not concerned about the [safety of the] sheep. 14 I am the Good Shepherd, and I know [without any doubt those who are] My own and My own know Me [and have a deep, personal relationship with Me]— 15 even as the Father knows Me and I know the Father—and I lay down My [very own] life [sacrificing it] for the benefit of the sheep. 16 I have [c] other sheep [beside these] that are not of this fold. I must bring those also, and they will listen to My voice and pay attention to My call, and they will become [d]one flock with one Shepherd. 17 For this reason the Father loves Me, because I lay down My [own] life so that I may take it back. 18 No one takes it away from Me, but I lay it down voluntarily. I am authorized and have power to lay it down and to give it up, and I am authorized and have power to take it back. This command I have received from My Father.”

In our reading Jesus explains that he is our shepherd, “the good shepherd” who “lays down his life for the sheep.”

Jesus also says the purpose of his coming into the world is to give us life in abundance. Unlike the thief, who comes to steal, kill, destroy the sheep, Jesus came so we can experience permanent joy, lasting peace, and eternal happiness.

Once, during a feast in Jerusalem, Jesus stood up and declared, “Let anyone who is thirsty come to me and drink. Whoever believes in me, as Scripture has said, rivers of living water will flow from within them” (John 7:37-38).

John 7:37-38 Amplified Bible

37 Now on the last and most important day of the feast, Jesus stood and called out [in a loud voice], “If anyone is thirsty, let him come to Me and drink! 38 He who believes in Me [who adheres to, trusts in, and relies on Me], as the Scripture has said, ‘From his innermost being will flow continually rivers of living water.’”

True happiness is in knowing Jesus by experiencing him and enjoying him. This is not just a theoretical or intellectual knowledge. Jesus is the water of life. We need to drink this water. Whoever drinks this water will never be thirsty again.

Jesus quenches our existential thirst, our over abundant hunger for meaning.

Although we may feel like an insignificant speck in the vast universe, Jesus became human, just like us. He, more than anyone, values his creation and gives us an unmatched gift: abundant life, more than we could ever realize.

In the name of God, the Father and God the Son and God the Holy Spirit,

Let us Pray,

Psalm 27 Amplified Bible

A Psalm of Fearless Trust in God.

A Psalm of David.

27 The Lord is my light and my salvation—
Whom shall I fear?
The Lord is the refuge and fortress of my life—
Whom shall I dread?

When the wicked came against me to eat up my flesh,
My adversaries and my enemies, they stumbled and fell.

Though an army encamp against me,
My heart will not fear;
Though war arise against me,
Even in this I am confident.


One thing I have asked of the Lord, and that I will seek:
That I may dwell in the house of the Lord [in His presence] all the days of my life,
To gaze upon the beauty [the delightful loveliness and majestic grandeur] of the Lord
And to meditate in His temple.

For in the day of trouble He will hide me in His shelter;
In the secret place of His tent He will hide me;
He will lift me up on a rock.

And now my head will be lifted up above my enemies around me,
In His tent I will offer sacrifices with shouts of joy;
I will sing, yes, I will sing praises to the Lord.


Hear, O Lord, when I cry aloud;
Be gracious and compassionate to me and answer me.

When You said, “Seek My face [in prayer, require My presence as your greatest need],” my heart said to You,
“Your face, O Lord, I will seek [on the authority of Your word].”

Do not hide Your face from me,
Do not turn Your servant away in anger;
You have been my help;
Do not abandon me nor [a]leave me,
O God of my salvation!
10 
Although my father and my mother have abandoned me,
Yet the Lord will take me up [adopt me as His child].

11 
Teach me Your way, O Lord,
And lead me on a level path
Because of my enemies [who lie in wait].
12 
Do not give me up to the will of my adversaries,
For false witnesses have come against me;
They breathe out violence.
13 
I would have despaired had I not believed that I would see the goodness of the Lord
In the land of the living.
14 
Wait for and confidently expect the Lord;
Be strong and let your heart take courage;
Yes, wait for and confidently expect the Lord.

Glory be to the Father,
and to the Son, and to the Holy Ghost;
as it was in the beginning,
is now, and ever shall be,
world without end. Amen, amen.

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Author: Thomas E Meyer Jr

Formerly Homeless Sinner Now, Child of God, Saved by Grace.

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