Ephesians 6:1-3 New American Standard Bible 1995
Family Relationships
6 Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. 2 Honor your father and mother (which is the first commandment with a promise), 3 so that it may be well with you, and that you may live long on the earth.
The Word of God for the Children of God.
Glory be to the Father,
and to the Son, and to the Holy Ghost;
as it was in the beginning,
is now, and ever shall be,
world without end. Amen, amen.
Some time ago, while sitting in a restaurant, I overheard a conversation between a teenager and her mother.
The mother was trying to convince her daughter that as long as she was in high school and living at home, she had to follow her parents’ rules.
At one point the daughter said, “I don’t have to listen to you just because you are my mother. I’m old enough to make my own decisions.”
Of course, the daughter had it wrong. Lewis Smedes, in his book Mere Morality, explains that God appoints parents to guide their children on his behalf.
The fifth commandment tells children of every age that they must honor and respect their parents, simply because they are their parents.
Children who are still living at home are expected to follow their parents’ rules.
The only exception would be a case in which the parents were busy asking their children to do something against God’s will.
Obeying our parents and listening to them can save us from a lot of hurt in life.
On more than one occasion I’ve heard adult children say, “I should have listened to my parents.”
Because of their life experience, parents often can better see the consequences of the decisions their children could make.
And making Christlike decisions in their own lives helps parents earn their children’s respect.
On two occasions when Paul gives to his readers a long list of the ugly fruits of godlessness, right in the middle we find one little phrase:
“disobedient to parents” (Romans 1:30; 2 Timothy 3:2).
Conversely, when you read church history, you discover that at times of spiritual awakening, practical godliness followed—including children’s submission to godly parental authority.
Paul writes children’s obedience to their parents is not merely a suggestion; it is an obligation.
Scripture teaches that such obedience is right according to the natural order of God’s creation, in accordance with His law, and as a response to the gospel.
Parents should not be afraid to call for, and praise, obedience.
But Paul doesn’t only say that obedience is right; he also says that it is rewarded.
In the Lord Jesus, there is a blessing that accompanies paying attention to God’s commands and promises.
And when parent-child relationships are marked by love, trust and obedience, we don’t just create healthy people; we also create a healthy, cohesive society.
Parents who wish to bring about such obedience would do well to remember five important truths that the Bible teaches about our children:
1. “Children are a heritage from the LORD” (Psalm 127:3).
They are a gift and a blessing.
Thinking of our children should prompt gratitude to the Giver of those children.
2. We don’t own our children; they belong to God. (Psalm 139:13-18)
They’re on loan to us, for a limited time.
3. Children are flawed from conception, guilty of sin and not deserving of eternal life—just like all of us (Psalm 58:3; Romans 3:23).
4. Because they are sinful, children are in need of the commandments of God. (Deuteronomy 6:4-12)
As parents, we are responsible for instructing them in God’s law from the earliest days.
5. Our children can be saved only by grace. Therefore, we must teach them to look to Jesus alone for salvation. (Luke 18:15-17)
Many of us live in a culture where these truths are opposed.
On the one hand, children are seen as innately good, and their education or health or happiness is held up as the highest good.
On the other, they are often bullies, the butt of jokes or subject of complaints.
Sometimes even within the church itself, there is an absence of clear, biblical statements about God, Godly family and Godly parenting.
But here is what God says: children growing up in the home are to obey their parents; parents are to raise their children to know God’s law and God’s grace.
If we would raise a generation in our homes and in our churches that is more godly and more zealous than ours, we would do well to nurture our children in the context of God’s truth.
Many, if not all of us, had parents with children in their homes.
All of us will be members of churches with children in our midst.
So what should it look like for us to contribute to the spiritual health of the next generation?
Honor Your Parents
Deuteronomy 5:16 New American Standard Bible 1995
16 ‘Honor your father and your mother, as the Lord your God has commanded you, that your days may be prolonged and that it may go well with you on the land which the Lord your God gives you.
This command was not written for the little children.
They have no choice but to honor their parents.
It was written to younger and older adults who lived with older generations.
Living together in a household with three or more generations was common in ancient Israel, as it is in some of our own very households and societies today.
How do you treat your elders, especially your parents?
I have seen some young people act worse toward their parents than they do toward anyone else.
They complain that they deserve more and nicer things.
They berate their parents because they aren’t up on the latest technology or trends.
They throw a fit when asked to do a simple household task.
When another adult says, “You sure have a wonderful child,” the parent is stunned.
Our best and our worst behavior comes out in our families.
That is why this scriptural reminder is absolutely critical and necessary.
Show honor to your parents.
It doesn’t matter if they aren’t as smart or capable as they once were.
It doesn’t matter that they, like everyone else, have flaws.
The criterion for honor and respect is the fact that they are your parents.
Scripture repeatedly teaches that honoring your parents will bring blessing.
This command closes with a promise, saying that God gives us life and blessing for honoring the parents he has given us.
How are we with caring for our own parents or grandparents?
Micah 6:6-8 New American Standard Bible 1995
What God Requires of Man
6 With what shall I come to the Lord
And bow myself before the God on high?
Shall I come to Him with burnt offerings,
With yearling calves?
7 Does the Lord take delight in thousands of rams,
In ten thousand rivers of oil?
Shall I present my firstborn for my rebellious acts,
The fruit of my body for the sin of my soul?
8 He has told you, O man, what is good;
And what does the Lord require of you
But to do justice, to love [a]kindness,
And to walk [b]humbly with your God?
Leviticus 19:32 New American Standard Bible 1995
32 ‘You shall rise up before the grayheaded and honor the [a]aged, and you shall revere your God; I am the Lord.
James 1:26-27 New American Standard Bible 1995
26 If anyone thinks himself to be religious, and yet does not [a]bridle his tongue but deceives his own heart, this man’s religion is worthless. 27 Pure and undefiled religion in the sight of our God and Father is this: to visit orphans and widows in their distress, and to keep oneself unstained [b]by the world.
How well is it with us as parents, as disciples, the church, doing what the Lord requires of us?
How well is it with us as parents, as disciples, as the church in advocating for justice for our children, our parents, our grandparents or great grandparents?
How much do we love kindness?
How about our allegedly ‘humble’ walk with our God, His Son and Holy Spirit?
How well is it with the church caring for its own widows and its own orphans?
This Lent, think muchly and pray even more about your children and family!
In the name of God, the Father and God the Son and God the Holy Spirit,
Let us Pray,
Father God in heaven, help us to honor and respect our parents. Forgive us if we have ignored them, and help us as children to be patient with their shortcomings.
Thank you, Father God, for our children, for parents, especially godly parents. Thank you for the gift they are in our lives and in others’ lives. Help us to show them proper honor and to respect all people as created and loved by you. In Jesus’ name, Amen.
Loving God, Living God, Loving Hope, Living Hope, Loving Living Life His Way! "Many things are possible for the person who has hope. Even more is possible for the person who has faith. And still more is possible for the person who knows how to love. But everything is possible for the person who practices all three virtues." - Brother Lawrence (1605-1691), Practicing the Presence of God (1692). 