God, our Creator and Our Emotional Health. Connecting our whole selves with the Word of God. Mark 12:28-34

There is an African – American Spiritual which declares to each of us today,

There is a balm in Gilead
To make the wounded whole
There is a balm in Gilead
To heal the sin-sick soul

Sometimes I feel discouraged
And deep I feel the pain
In prayers the holy spirit
Revives my soul again

There is a balm in Gilead
To make the wounded whole
There is a balm in Gilead
To heal the sin-sick soul.

Let’s take a feeling test this morning.

Let Me Ask each of us these questions:

What are you and I feeling now?

What all did you and I feel yesterday?

What do you and I hope and pray you and I will feel tomorrow?

Who felt loving, happy, sad, hateful, angry, joyful, thankful, disappointed, depressed, jealous, ambitious, surprised, convicted, hopeful and who felt as though God’s love wanted to use them to make a difference in someone’s life?

Today we are going to take a brief biblical look at emotional health.

That is how to deal with how you feel.

Yesterday we talked about the heartbeat of love and hate.

“I Hate to Love!” and “I Love to Hate!”

Today we are going to begin looking at how to manage your emotions.

Moving into a “GOD” direction of “I Love to Love!” and “I Hate to Hate!”

I am pretty sure we all know the answer to this question …

When has anyone of us here ever had a change, good or bad, take place in their life because they did not keep your range of Love and Hate emotions in check?

We are going to look at what the Bible says about our emotional health and how to perhaps, even hopefully and prayerfully, successfully manage your emotions.

In the name of Father, Son and Holy Spirit, how to deal with how you and I feel.

Mark 12:28-34 Amplified Bible

28 Then one of the scribes [an expert in Mosaic Law] came up and listened to them arguing [with one another], and noticing that Jesus answered them well, asked Him, “Which commandment is first and most important of all?” 29 Jesus answered, “The first and most important one is: ‘Hear, O Israel, the Lord our God is one Lord; 30 and you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul (life), and with all your mind (thought, understanding), and with all your strength.’ 31 This is the second: ‘You shall [unselfishly] [a]love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no other commandment greater than these.” 32 The scribe said to Him, “Admirably answered, Teacher; You truthfully stated that He is One, and there is no other but Him; 33 and to love Him with all the heart and with all the understanding and with all the strength, and to [unselfishly] love one’s neighbor as oneself, is much more than all burnt offerings and sacrifices.” 34 When Jesus saw that he answered thoughtfully and intelligently, He said to him, “You are not far from the kingdom of God.” And after that, no one would dare to ask Him any more questions.

The Word of God for the Children of God. Gloria! In Excelsis Deo! Alleluia! Amen.

Mark 12:34 … Young’s Literal Translation

34 And Jesus, having seen him that he answered with understanding, said to him, `Thou art not far from the reign of God;’ and no one any more durst question him.

Today we will begin to explore how emotional health and trust are linked.

Truth is, thanks be to God, we are all emotional beings and how we are doing emotionally (positively and negatively) affects all of us on a regular basis.

God our Creator, the Author of our entire Life has something to say about yours and mine emotional health, and it is my fervent hope you, the readership, are and become greatly encouraged and feel the touch of just one of the tears Jesus cried for you and receive a fresh anointing from the Holy Spirit, come to know how deeply you and I are loved by the Lord as we focus in on this truth today.

Do you know that God cares deeply about your emotions?

Gospel Truth is this: Your heavenly Father longs for your life to be marked by emotional joy, fulfillment, satisfaction, and peace. He longs for your emotions to be rooted and grounded in his steadfast love and goodness.

Our Savior is an emotional Savior. He is not void of feelings.

We feel because he feels.

We have emotions because we are made in his image.

For much of my Christian life I thought my emotions had to be based on my circumstances.

I felt happy or sad based on others’ opinions, the pressures of life, and opportunities I had or didn’t have.

As a result, I was on a constant emotional roller coaster following the ups and downs of this shaky world. I found myself controlled by the things of the world rather than the foundation of love laid before me by the sacrificial love of Jesus.

Scripture continually describes a link between emotional health and trust.

Isaiah 26:3-4 says, “You keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on you, because he trusts in you. Trust in the Lord forever, for the Lord God is an everlasting rock.” 

Psalm 56:3-4 says, “When I am afraid, I put my trust in you. In God, whose word I praise, in God I trust; I shall not be afraid. What can flesh do to me?” 

And Psalm 33:21 says, “For our heart is glad in him, because we trust in his holy name.”

We are robbed of having our emotions rooted in God whenever we take on more pressure than we are meant to carry.

Our emotional health is directly linked to our level of trust.

We feel pressure at work when we look to our job and co-workers for our provision, identity, purpose, and fulfillment.

We feel pressure in our relationships when our worth isn’t based on God’s perspective but the opinions of others.

We are robbed of peace when we try and plan our own steps rather than following our Good Shepherd into the green pastures and still waters.

In John 14:27 Jesus says, 

“Peace, I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid.” 

God’s heart is to fill you with peace.

He longs for you to have all the fruit of the Spirit dwelling within you.

He has consistent, constant peace available to you.

But you must trust him in every area of your life.

You must hand over the reins of your relationships, job, identity, and plans to your Good Shepherd.

You must love and trust that he will guide you perfectly into an abundant life.

Mark 12:29-30 Jesus says this

“The most important commandment is this, You must love the Lord your God with all your heart and all your soul and all your mind and all your strength.”

Do you understand the emotion involved in this passage?

If this verse had said, you must love your favorite football team, or favorite singer, or favorite actor with all of your heart, soul, mind and strength,

what imagery comes to your mind?

How are you going to act at the game, at the concert, or at the movie?

Would people think you were a little radical, a little nuts?

God is saying, I want to have an emotional relationship with you, where you throw everything, you have into it.

God even complains when we don’t do it.

He says, these people honor me with their lips, but their hearts are far from me.

Have you ever seen somebody do something, and though they did it right, you could tell their heart just wasn’t in it.

God wants us to be emotionally involved in our relationship to him.

Look to your heavenly Father for peace.

Find rest in his abundant love.

Find your self-worth in the fact that God so desired relationship with you that he laid down his own life to have it.

UNDERSTAND MY EMOTIONS

Let me give you some truths about your emotions before we get into this.

1. First, Our Savior has emotions.

Jesus was God in the flesh.

Can you imagine the whole range of emotions he went through riding on the back of the foal as he entered the city gates of Jerusalem?

“Hosanna! Hosanna! Hosanna!” “Save us we Pray! Save us we Pray!” the crowd of people joyously shouted at the top of their lungs as Jesus recalled his destiny

He was happy to see the people turn out in large numbers.

He was thankful for the praises of the people.

He was disappointed that the Pharisees could not see what was taking place.

He was angry that religious leaders wanted him to silence the crowd.

He was so angry when He entered the Temple grounds, he turned over tables and yelled above the raucous din and activity of the “marketplace” inside.

He was sad that the people didn’t understand their true need.

He cried because he knew the destruction the Roman army would inflict on some of the people there.

He felt rejection because he knew the cross was still less than a week away.

Our Savior Jesus has emotions.

The only reason you have emotions is because you’re made in God’s image.

If our Savior was not an emotional Savior, we wouldn’t have any emotions.

We would not read: “Jesus Wept!”

2. My ability to feel is a gift from God.

Your emotions are a gift from God.

They may not always seem that way.

But even the negative ones have a role in your life.

God can use them to show you your need for him.

Emotions are a great asset.

They’re the one thing that make you and me human.

If you and I didn’t have emotions, you and I would just be a robot.

How many of you would want to be married to a robot?

It is our emotional ability that allows us to love and create and to be faithful and loyal and kind and generous and all the range of the emotions that are attached to both the good and bad and catastrophic things in life.

One of the most astounding verses in the Bible is 

Genesis 1:26 “Let us make man in our image.”

In OUR Image.

As I said the only reason you have emotions is because God gave them to you.

And you were made in his image.

3. There are two extremes to avoid.

There are two extremes you need to avoid in dealing with emotions.

One is called emotionalism and the other is called stoicism

Emotionalism means all that matters is how I feel.

Emotionalism is the extreme of saying the only thing that matters in life is how I feel.

It does not matter what I think, it doesn’t matter what’s right or wrong, it doesn’t matter what’s popular or unpopular, good or bad.

What matters is doing and responding to what you feel.

If it feels good, do it.

If I am full of Emotionalism, my emotions, they control my life, they dominate my life, they run my life and I am a very emotionally centered person.

Stoicism – feelings aren’t important at all. Stoicism is the exact opposite. It basically says feelings aren’t important at all. The only thing that matters is the measure of your intellect and your will – your volition and your intelligence.

So, the stoics say emotions are not part of life; feelings do not really matter.

We lean one way or the other and have a tendency to marry someone on the other end. One of us wants to tell the whole story with all the drama, and the other one just wants to hear the basic facts.

Like Joe Friday, from Dragnet, we say “the facts mam, just the facts.”

Actually, both of these are extreme positions.

And the happy medium is where you really want to be.

It’s not emotionalism or stoicism.

You want to know how to worship God with your emotions as shown by the facts of the truth of the Word of God.

God gave us our emotions for a reason.

God wants us to worship him emotionally.

God wants us to feel it.

In fact, God complains in the Scripture many times you’re just worshiping with your lips but not with your emotions, not with your heart.

You don’t really feel it.

By the way the word “emotion” isn’t used that often in the Bible because the Bible uses the word “passions” or “affections” or the number one term for emotions is “heart.”

We still use that today.

When you fall in love, what part of your body do you symbolically give to the person to show it.

You say, “I give you, my whole heart.”

Heart is the symbol of love and emotions.

Even today we say, “I love you with all my heart.”

In the bible, the word of God, the mind represents the intellect and the heart represents emotions. Both of them are involved in the worship of our God.

We come to church to learn about God and to feel the presence of God. That’s why our praise and our worship is as important as hearing the preached word.

We now know that those are actually two different circuit systems in your brain.

Your emotions have an amazing system as well as your thoughts do.

Some things you just react emotionally without even thinking about it.

4. GOD GAVE US THE PSALMS IN ORDER TO UNDERSTAND OUR EMOTIONS.

If you have a hard time with some emotions in your life you need to spend a lot of time in the book of Psalms.

Psalms has every emotion known to man in it – the good ones and the bad ones.

The positive and the negative.

You read some of those psalms and you think,

“Why is this chapter in the Bible?”

It’s there to teach you about even those negative emotions.

Because not all psalms are about praise and thanksgiving.

There are psalms of anger and there are psalms of complaining and psalms of lament and sorrow.

There are psalms of arguing with God.

Every emotion known to man is in the Psalms and God is saying all of these are legitimate.

I give these Words to you.

Psalm 127:1 Amplified Bible

Prosperity Comes from the Lord.

A Song of [a]Ascents. Of Solomon.

127 Unless the Lord builds the house,
They labor in vain who build it;
Unless the Lord guards the city,
The watchman keeps awake in vain.

Psalm 100 Amplified Bible

All Men Exhorted to Praise God.

A Psalm of Thanksgiving.

100 Shout joyfully to the Lord, all the earth.

Serve the Lord with gladness and delight;
Come before His presence with joyful singing.

Know and fully recognize with gratitude that the Lord Himself is God;
It is He who has made us, [a]not we ourselves [and we are His].
We are His people and the sheep of His pasture.


Enter His gates with a song of thanksgiving
And His courts with praise.
Be thankful to Him, bless and praise His name.

For the Lord is good;
His mercy and lovingkindness are everlasting,
His faithfulness [endures] to all generations.

Psalm 70 Amplified Bible

Prayer for Help against Persecutors.

To the Chief Musician. A Psalm of David, to bring to remembrance.

70 O God, come quickly to save me;
O Lord, come quickly to help me!

Let those be ashamed and humiliated
Who seek my life;
Let them be turned back and humiliated
Who delight in my hurt.

Let them be turned back because of their shame and disgrace
Who say, “Aha, aha!”


May all those who seek You [as life’s first priority] rejoice and be glad in You;
May those who love Your salvation say continually,
“Let God be magnified!”

But I am afflicted and needy;
Come quickly to me, O God!
You are my help and my rescuer;
O Lord, do not delay.

In Psalm 70 we read today, in just those first five verses, we found desperation, frustration, anger, encouragement, confidence, humility and hope AND GOD!

So, we’re going to take some quality time at how to deal with how WE feel.

It is important for us to learn how to deal with managing our emotions and how to deal with an unwanted devotion.

Your Father counts you worthy of the death of his only Son.

Trust him today.

Place your entire life in his capable hands.

And experience God’s abundant life in the area of your emotions, rooting and grounding yourself in his unconditional, available love.

May your life be marked by increasing emotional health as you grow in trust.

Tomorrow, we’re going to try and examine why we must take quality time with God in our shared efforts to learn how to in Jesus’ name, manage our emotions.

In the name of God, the Father and God the Son and God the Holy Spirit,

Prayer

1. Meditate on the link between trust and emotional health. Allow Scripture to stir up your desire and willingness to trust God with every area of your life.

“For our heart is glad in him, because we trust in his holy name.” Psalm 33:21

“When I am afraid, I put my trust in you. In God, whose word I praise, in God I trust; I shall not be afraid. What can flesh do to me?” Psalm 56:3-4

2. Where are you not experiencing abundant life in your emotions? Where are you feeling void of peace, joy, passion, and purpose?

3. Ask God to help you discern what part of your life you are not trusting to him. Hand over that area to him and find peace and rest in his trustworthiness.

“You keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on you, because he trusts in you. Trust in the Lord forever, for the Lord God is an everlasting rock.” Isaiah 26:3-4

“Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 4:6-7

“Peace, I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid.” John 14:27

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Heartbeat of Love and Hate. “I Love to Hate!” “I Hate to Love!” 1 John 3:11-18.

Human nature we say has multiple intense emotions attached to it, a couple of those intense feelings condensed into 4 letter words are love and hate.

If it is justified that we can just happen to instinctively or naturally love a person or an activity, can the same logic be used to justify hatred?

To understand if that is the case or not, we need to begin by defining hatred.

Both Merriam Webster, as well as Oxford dictionary, define hate as ‘extreme disgust’ and ‘intense dislike’ respectively.

Of course, both the adjectives mentioned here are pretty vague because it is difficult to decide what level of extremity or what measure of intensity can be termed as extreme or intense, the constant question comes, what parameters qualify this threshold?

Love and hate are two parallel emotions that are always used together. One needs to experience the extremes of hate/love to know entirely about them. 

Hate is defined as a powerful feeling of not liking somebody/something at all. It’s a negative emotion that affects our rationales and way of thinking, and it comes out of anger, hostility and resentment. Hate harms the hater as well as the hated person, and it makes life more miserable.

In simple words where a feeling of mild disgust or of mild dislike makes us uncomfortable till that extent which we end up having a subconscious wanting to harm or cancel or just eliminate the target, that’s where the mild feeling gets converted into hatred. 

Think about this. Our mental defense mechanisms are self-protective in nature, we subconsciously end up equipping the tool of greatest personal reassurance.

Hence, if we have already devalued the image a person or a group in our mind on the basis of what we have ‘heard’, we confirm the bias against something that we already have heard to reinforce and reassure our beliefs we feed ourselves with even more information to back it.

Aristotle states that ‘whereas anger is customarily felt toward individuals, hatred is often felt towards groups…. hate is based on the generalized attribution of action to the basic traits and features of a person’.

Hence if one day we experience or get to know that an individual having a specific trait, be it color or religion or anything similar we rather than disliking that specific instance end up reinforcing our stereotype that we have made and label the group showing that trait to be potential causes of the same actions. 

Rather than hate, one should always spread love and bring positivity in their and others’ lives. One should not let hatred consume them as it will only have both serious and severe adverse effects on their physical and mental health.

Hence, I have brought these love – hate quotes to yours and mine attention to “put an elbow into our ribcages” and remind us to spread happiness and love!

“Hate, it has caused a lot of problems in this world but has not solved one yet.” Maya Angelou

“Darkness cannot drive out darkness: only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate: only love can do that.” Martin Luther King Jr.
Source: A Testament of Hope: The Essential Writings and Speeches

“I have decided to stick to love…Hate is too great a burden to bear.” Martin Luther King Jr.
Source: A Testament of Hope: The Essential Writings and Speeches

“Somewhere between love and hate lies confusion, misunderstanding and desperate hope.” Shannon L. Alder

“When we don’t know who to hate, we hate ourselves.” Chuck Palahniuk
Source: Invisible Monsters

“I imagine one of the reasons people cling to their hates so stubbornly is because they sense, once hate is gone, they will be forced to deal with pain.” James Baldwin
Source: The Fire Next Time

“I will permit no man to narrow and degrade my soul by making me hate him.” Booker T. Washington

“Hating people because of their color is wrong. And it doesn’t matter which color does the hating. It’s just plain wrong.” Muhammad Ali

“Throughout life people will make you mad, disrespect you and treat you bad. Let God deal with the things they do, cause hate in your heart will consume you too.” Will Smith

It is our love for one another that lets our light shine unto the world and boldly states we are Christians!

In 1 John 3:11-18 John states if one is indifferent or hates a brother or sister then either one is not saved or is out of fellowship with God.

1 John 3:11-18Amplified Bible

11 For this is the message which you [believers] have heard from the beginning [of your relationship with Christ], that we should [unselfishly] love and seek the best for one another; 12 and not be like Cain, who was of the evil one and murdered his brother [Abel]. And why did he murder him? Because Cain’s deeds were evil, and his brother’s were righteous.

13 Do not be surprised, believers, if the world hates you. 14 We know that we have passed out of death into Life, because we love the brothers and sisters. He who does not love remains in [spiritual] death. 15 Everyone who hates (works against) his brother [in Christ] is [at heart] a murderer [by God’s standards]; and you know that no murderer has eternal life abiding in him. 16 By this we know [and have come to understand the depth and essence of His precious] love: that He [willingly] laid down His life for us [because He loved us]. And we ought to lay down our lives for the believers. 17 But whoever has the [a]world’s goods (adequate resources), and sees his brother in need, but has no compassion for him, how does the love of God live in him? 18 Little children (believers, dear ones), let us not love [merely in theory] with word or with tongue [giving lip service to compassion], but in action and in truth [in practice and in sincerity, because practical acts of love are more than words].

The Word of God for the Children of God. Gloria! In Excelsis Deo! Alleluia! Amen.

A new command Christ has given to us born of the water and the Spirit.

That is to “love one another” so that the world will “know that you are My disciplines” (John 13:34)!

As Christ’s ambassadors (2 Corinthians 5:20) we are called to not curse human beings made in God’s image (James 3:9) but instead labor to do good unto them (Luke 6:27) so that the comfort and love we have received (2 Corinthians 1:3-5) from the Father might be apparent and a witness of His grace and mercy.

If by Jesus’ own words, (Matthew 5:43-44) If God commands us to love our enemies, pray for those who persecute us. then how much more ought we love, seek unity and peace with our spiritual brothers within the same body of Christ?

While the command to love one another is clearly to be a priority for God’s own it is difficult to put into practice because it invites intense persecution!

Rabbi Jesus warns us that while obeying His command to love results in our light shining amongst the lost it at the same time invites hatred amongst those who don’t want to approach the light because their evil deeds will be exposed (John 3:20, 15:18).

While it is painful to be persecuted by non-Christians who have not passed from death to life (1 John 3:14), how much more so when indifference or “active antagonism” comes from within the body of believers?

This was the situation that Apostle John wrote about in 1 John 3:11-18.

The Johanne community were “experiencing a pattern of prejudicial treatment and resentment” from two God-fearing bodies.

First, the Jews were putting them out of the synagogue and killing them (John 16:2, 9:34) due to their belief in the Messiah dying once and for all, and

second, they faced intense persecution from a group of heretics, followers of Cerinthus, that were spreading false teaching.

The incredibly sad part is that these secessionists used to belong to their church!

Today’s devotion is going review the reasons John gave as to why it is not ok to be indifferent or outright hate those created in God’s image, especially when they belong to the same body of Christ because such negative emotions often demonstrate your bond is with Satan and you in fact are not born again!

The Message from the Beginning

John begins by stating that he is “not giving the church a message they have never heard” but instead one that was given from the beginning!

The command to love was Christ’s command given to His disciples “likely dependent of the Last Supper discourse.”

Jesus said, “a new command I give you: love one another. As I have loved you, so must you love one another. By this everyone will know you are my disciples if you love one another” (John 13:34-35).

This is not meant to be some “academic, theological, doctrinal statement,” but one of the litmus tests one can use to determine if one has indeed “passed from death to life” (1 John 3:14)!

“As the knowledge of God is tested by conduct—whether one walks in the light (1:5–2:11)—so being “born of God” (2:29) is tested by righteous action and love of the brethren.”

While the definition of “love” by the world is incredibly broad and often self-gratifying, the kind of love John is referring to,

agape love, is the “responsibility to demonstrate selfless concern for our brothers and sisters in Christ as our response to the grace God has given us!”

Agape love is crucial for “living for Jesus and for advancing God’s kingdom.”

Because it is by considering others better than ourselves and looking out for their best interests (Philippians 2:3) that one demonstrates one has indeed received and is now able to pass the comfort one has received from the Father onto His children!

It is not by our carrying Bibles, singing worship songs, theological astuteness, or even the size of our church or our congregations that others see God’s light but instead by our visible and invisible expression of sacrificial love for them!

While we are called to love all humans because they are created in God’s image,

John stresses how important it is to show those who have a bond with the Devil and are filled with jealousy, hatred and strife that when you chose a bond with God through belief in the atoning sacrifice of His Son (John 3:16-17) you receive the opposite: expressions of unity, peace and love for both God and one another.

It is covenanted within this testimony of love that a believer can point the lost sheep to the Good Shepherd to be found, loved, and redeemed by His blood!

Hatred as a Sign of Death

Before John tells his audience more about the love believers are to emulate, he begins by using Cain as an example of the opposite of love, hated!

We are told in Genesis chapter four that “in the course of time” (4:3) both Cain and Abel brought offerings unto the Lord.

While “Cain brought some of the fruits of the soil” Abel brought “fat portions from some of the firstborn of the flock” (4:3-4).

We are told that the Lord looked favorably on Abel’s offering and rejected Cain’s (4:4-5). “Cain became very angry; his face was downcast” (4:5) so the Lord said to Cain, “if you do what is right, will you not be accepted? But if you do not do what is right, sin is crouching at your door; it desires to have you, but you must rule over it” (4:7).

In a fit of jealousy and anger we are told that Cain invited his brother Abel to go out into the field where he proceeded to butcher him like one would an animal!

I believe the greater issue here is not that Cain brought an inferior sacrifice, a grain instead of animal sacrifice as some commentaries suggest, but that Cain lacked love, trust and faith (Hebrews 11:4) to give God his very best and was filled with murderous hatred in the sight of his brother’s righteousness!

Despite both brothers being raised in the same environment and by the same parents, unlike Abel, Cain chose to reject God as the Master of his destiny and tried to control his own future.

Cain did not “become a child of the Devil (1 John 3:12) by murdering his brother.

Rather, he murders his brother because he is already a child of the Devil!”

The “evil character of Cain is universally assumed in both biblical, extrabiblical sources” and the murder of Abel constantly reminds us that every single person has to make a choice between “hatred and love, life and death, murder and self-sacrifice” that comes from either having love, trust and faith in self or in God!

With the story of Cain in mind John boldly warns the successionists, the Jewish people and his own flock that what one possesses within one’s heart, either good or evil, is a sign of whether one has passed from death to life (1 John 3:14)!

From Cain’s murder of Abel, we learn an absence of love means living in an atmosphere of death!

Our choosing between being “right in our own eyes, being right in the eyes of God will draw hatred from others who cannot tolerate the light, morality, and selfless, sacrificial righteousness of those who rely on God’s grace and mercy.

Since “genuine love cannot be fabricated or imitated, it is either present within our hearts from Christ or not.”

Love and fellowship with God are an amazing barometer to determine if one is saved or not!

In Mark 7:21-23 Rabbi Jesus said that true murder is that which is conceived in the heart. For from within, out of the heart of man, come evil thoughts, sexual immorality, theft, murder, adultery, greed malice, deceit, lewdness, and envy, slander, arrogance, and folly.

All these evils come from inside and make a man unclean!

An absence of evil within one’s heart or having love for others “will not cause spiritual life to occur but will give evidence of it. Conversely, to be unable to love means that a person is without life from the Father and remains in death.”

For John when a believer is either indifferent or outright hates other believers this is the “spiritual equivalent of murder” (Matthew 5:21-22), as a lustful eye is the spiritual equivalent of adultery (Matthew 5:28).

John is not saying that any person who hates is unsaved or have committed an unpardonable sin but merely that since “hate and death go together” as evil from the Devil, these are signs one either has not passed from death to life or at the very least are not abiding in the new life in Christ, therefore stand outside of the fellowship of God!

To these first century secessionists who rejected both faith in Jesus (2:22–23; 4:2–3) and love for one’s brothers and sisters (2:9–11; 3:11–15), John point blank states you are not saved but to those inside his flock he is saying that since by your fruit you will be known make every effort to not hate but love those within the family of God!

Love as a Sign of Life

When it comes to knowing exactly what love is, John says we are to emulate Jesus who laid down His life for us (1 John 3:16)!

While Cain is a universally acknowledged example of ultimate hate,

He who emptied Himself and became the suffering servant for even His enemies is an ultimately holy and ultimately perfect example of agape love!

The kind of love we are to have for our brothers and sisters in Christ is one that goes beyond self to focus on the well-being of all others.

When John speaks of Christ laying down His life this makes us think of the passage where Jesus talks about being the Good Shepherd who voluntarily lays down His life for the sheep (John 10:11, 15-18).

Agape “love is denial of self for another’s gain.”

It is doing what Jesus Himself already did and continues to do.

It is becoming like Apostle Paul who said, “I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I now live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved and gave Himself for me” (Galatians 2:20).

“The effacement, (the quality of not claiming attention for oneself) of another’s rights and perhaps existence for one’s own sake is the essence of hatred; the effacement of oneself for another’s sake is the essence of agape love!”

Being angry, envious, and holding extreme grudges against those born again and created in the image of God drives a wedge between us and Him for God above all is pure love!

While loving all people, especially those with different dreams, goals, hobbies, and yes even different theology is impossible for our sinful natures to accept, those born of the water and Spirit (John 3:5) can do so for they have been given a new heart to replace their one of stone (Ezekiel 36:26)!

While we “are unlikely to have opportunities to literally die for others” we are to walk in Christ’s footsteps and voluntarily (John 10:18) “sacrifice our own self-interests” so that the vertical relationship of love between us and the Father might horizontally be known amongst our fellow believers!

It is through this kind of sacrificial other focused love that the world and we too see ourselves as true children of God!

To keep these first century Secessionists, Jews, and members of his own church from enthusiastically speaking with the tongue the kind of love that is not in their hearts; above all,

John says agape love “must be practical, visible, and active” (1 John 3:17-18)!

How easy and self-assuring it is to say I love all of humanity while at the very same time being indifferent or hatful towards those who are “uninteresting, exasperating, depraved, or otherwise radically different and unattractive!”

To follow in Jesus’ footsteps, one must be willing to seek and acknowledge the needs of others by practically meeting them when possible.

What would have happened to us if Christ had not emptied Himself of the glory, He had with the Father but instead chose not to lift a finger to help us “sinful, ungodly, unrighteous folks?” What if Paul never wrote Romans chapter 5,6?

Without His grace and mercy would we not remain lost sheep looking for our Master?

“Actions speak louder than words”

for it is precisely in our putting other’s interests above our own that we demonstrate we have learned much from the Lord who is our Shepherd!

Since “love that fails to take form of action on behalf of others is nothing more than religious rhetoric,” with unspeakable joy in the presence of He who voluntarily atoned for our sins may we emulate His love for all by offering those around us whatever we can to reduce their burdens.

Since we have more material possessions than even the children of Israel when they entered the Promised Land, let’s give sacrificially, not with the expectation of reciprocity but with thankful hearts that what God has entrusted to us we get to share with His own!

Let us not give up meeting together (Hebrews 10:25), become indifferent to some and infatuated by others, but instead let us share with one another, unified as one body in Christ who share the same Spirit and glorious hope of one day going home to be with Jesus!

Let this be one more Affirmation of faith, hope and love for today,

“Lord Jesus the love and comfort You have given me help me to share it with my brothers and sisters for Your honor and glory, Alleluia! Alleluia! Amen!”

In the name of God, the Father and God the Son and God the Holy Spirit,

Let us Pray,

Father, my Guide, illuminate my mind so I can understand how you want me to live. Your word tells me that people of integrity who follow your instructions are joyful. You have said that those who obey your laws and search for you with all their hearts are blessed and happy. I want that joy! Holy Spirit, please guard me against allowing evil to influence what I believe and do. Help me walk only in your paths. May my actions consistently reflect what you have said is right and good. Gloria! In Excelsis Deo! Alleluia! Alleluia! Alleluia! Amen.

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When Giving Advice: “It is always wise, wiser, and wisest to pay close, closer, closest attention to who you pay close, closer, closest attention to.” 1Kings 12

The Bible tells us to seek advice.

But not all advice is good advice.

It pays to pay attention to whom you pay attention to.

But how do I know the difference between good advice and bad?

In my files I have the following pieces of advice that you may want to consider:

· Always keep your words soft and sweet, just in case you have to eat them.

· Never buy a car you cannot push to the service station five miles away.

  • When everything’s coming your way, you’re probably in the wrong lane.

· Find out what you do not do well, then do not do it.

· Never put both feet in your mouth at the same time, because then you won’t have any legs to stand on.

· An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of bandages and adhesive tape.

· It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others.

The world is filled with people who would like to give us advice.

And the Bible SAYS it is a good thing to listen to advice.

For example:

Proverbs 12:15 “The way of a fool seems right to him, but a wise man listens to advice.”

Proverbs 15:22 “Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers they succeed.”

Proverbs 19:20-21 “Listen to advice and accept instruction, and in the end you will be wise.

Proverbs 16:1 “The plans and reflections of the heart belong to man,
But the [wise] answer of the tongue is from the Lord.

Interestingly enough those proverbs were written by Solomon for the benefit of his sons – those who would come to sit on the very throne of Israel after he died.

Repeatedly – throughout Proverbs – Solomon would say things like this:

“Listen, my son, to your father’s instruction and do not forsake your mother’s teaching.” Proverbs 1:8

From One Generation to the next, we try to impart the very best advice to then that they might come to avoid making the same mistakes we made, they would come to make better, sounder and much more thoroughly considered decisions.

But does this always work?

It would be so much greater than great for everyone in whole the world if it did.

But as we are about to read and consider from our biblical text – our answer is:

Obviously, Unfortunately, Ultimately, NOT!

1 Kings 12:1-19Amplified Bible

King Rehoboam Acts Foolishly

12 Rehoboam went to [a]Shechem, for all Israel had come to Shechem to make him king. Now when Jeroboam the son of Nebat heard about it, he was living in Egypt (for he was still in Egypt, where he had fled from King Solomon)So they sent word and called for him, and Jeroboam and all the assembly of Israel came and spoke to Rehoboam, saying, “Your father made our yoke (burden) heavy; so now lighten the hard labor and the heavy yoke your father imposed on us, and we will serve you.” Rehoboam replied to them, “Leave for three days, then come back to me [for my decision].” So, the people left.

King Rehoboam consulted with the elders who had served and advised his father Solomon while he was still alive and said, “How do you advise me to answer this people?” They spoke to him, saying, “If you will be a servant to this people today, and will serve them and grant their request, and speak good words to them, then they will be your servants forever.” But he [b]ignored the advice which the elders gave him and consulted the young men who grew up with him and served him. He said to them, “What do you advise that we answer this people who have said to me, ‘Lighten the yoke (burden) which your father put on us’?” 10 The young men who had grown up with him answered, “This is what you should say to this people who told you, ‘Your father made our yoke heavy, but as for you, make our yoke lighter’—say this to them: ‘My little finger is thicker than my father’s loins [and my reign will be even more severe]. 11 And now, whereas my father loaded you with a heavy yoke, I will add to your yoke. My father disciplined you with whips, but I will discipline you with [c]scorpions.’”

12 Jeroboam and all the people came back to Rehoboam on the third day, just as the king had instructed, saying, “Return to me on the third day.” 13 The king answered the people harshly and [d]ignored the advice which the elders had given him, 14 and spoke to them in accordance with the advice of the young men, saying, “My father made your yoke heavy, but as for me, I will add to your yoke; my father disciplined you with whips, but I will discipline you with scorpions.” 15 So the king did not listen to the people; for the situation was from the Lord, so that He might fulfill His word which He spoke through Ahijah the Shilonite to Jeroboam the son of Nebat.

The Kingdom Divided, Jeroboam Rules Israel

16 So when all [the ten northern tribes of] Israel saw that the king did not listen to them, the people replied to the king, saying,

“What portion do we have in David?
We have no inheritance in the son of Jesse;
To your tents, O Israel!
Look now after [e]your own house, David!”

Then Israel went back to their tents. 17 But as for the sons (descendants) of Israel who lived in the cities of Judah [including Benjamin], Rehoboam reigned over them. 18 Then King Rehoboam sent [f]Adoram, who was in charge of the forced labor [to represent him], and all Israel stoned him to death. And King Rehoboam quickly mounted his chariot to escape to Jerusalem. 19 So Israel (the ten northern tribes) has rebelled against the house (royal line) of David to this day (the date of this writing).

The Word of God for the Children of God. Gloria! In Excelsis Deo! Alleluia! Amen.

Solomon’s oldest son was Rehoboam.

Solomon’s oldest son was Rehoboam, and today we’re reading about the day Rehoboam sought that very kind of advice.

When Solomon died, his throne was passed down to his eldest son Rehoboam.

Rehoboam was approached by his people saying they needed relief from the high taxes his father had imposed during his reign to build the Temple and to govern and run the kingdom.

Wisely, Rehoboam asked for 3 days so that he could consult with his advisors.

1st he goes to his father’s advisors… older men whom Solomon trusted for good advice.

These men tell Rehoboam to listen to the people.

They say, “If today you will be a servant to these people and serve them and give them a favorable answer, they will always be your servants.” 12:7

But Rehoboam rejected the advice of these Elders.

Instead, Rehoboam goes to his friends, his younger inexperienced friends … and asks their advice.

But HIS friends are not wise and experienced men.

They are proud, arrogant and selfish men.

They like to “talk big”.

They probably spend a great deal of their time sitting around and making fun of people who aren’t like them.

These are men who probably enjoyed the “trash talk” of their day.

And you can tell – that’s the kind of men they are – from the kind of answer they give Rehoboam

“Tell these people who have said to you, ‘Your father put a heavy yoke on us, but make our yoke lighter’— tell them, ‘My little finger is thicker than my father’s waist. My father laid on you a heavy yoke; I will make it even heavier. My father scourged you with whips; I will scourge you with scorpions.’”

Now, it doesn’t take much of a genius to realize that this was definitely NOT the smartest advice they could have given in that moment when Charity is required.

Those were not words destined to make a whole lot of people very happy with their new King Rehoboam.

Those weren’t the words a good king would say.

Those were the words of tyrants and bullies.

People who like to push others around.

(Pause…) But those were the words Rehoboam listened to.

Where Charity and Love Prevail ….

Where Greed and Avarice Prevail ….

And so, when the people of Israel reassembled 3 days later,

King Rehoboam shows off for his friends and as a result — he loses nearly everything he’d inherited from his father. He lost more than half his kingdom and neither he nor any of his descendants could ever get it back again.

From that day forward,

the 10 tribes of Israel (to the North) and the two tribes of Judah (to the South and ruled by the descendants of Rehoboam) were never to be reunited again.

The ultimate focus of this devotional message today is this:

Proverbs 16:1 Amplified Bible

Contrast the Upright and the Wicked

16 The plans and reflections of the heart belong to man,
But the [wise] answer of the tongue is from the Lord.

It pays to pay attention to who you pay attention to.

NOT ALL advice is good advice.

Psalm 1 Amplified Bible

Book One

The Righteous and the Wicked Contrasted.

[a]Blessed [fortunate, prosperous, and favored by God] is the man who does not walk in the counsel of the wicked [following their advice and example],
Nor stand in the path of sinners,
Nor sit [down to rest] in the seat of [b]scoffers (ridiculers).


But his delight is in the law of the Lord,
And on His law [His precepts and teachings] he [habitually] meditates day and night.


And he will be like a tree firmly planted [and fed] by streams of water,
Which yields its fruit in its season;
Its leaf does not wither;
And in whatever he does, he prospers [and comes to maturity].


The wicked [those who live in disobedience to God’s law] are not so,
But they are like the chaff [worthless and without substance] which the wind blows away.


Therefore, the wicked will not stand [unpunished] in the judgment,
Nor sinners in the assembly of the righteous.


For the Lord knows and fully approves the way of the righteous,
But the way of the wicked shall perish.

In that short Psalm, God warns us to be careful who we hang around with.

Who we listen to.

Blessed [fortunate, prosperous, and favored by God] is the man who does

· Doesn’t walk in the counsel of the wicked

· Doesn’t stand in the way of the sinners

· Doesn’t sit in the seat of mockers.

Why not?

Why don’t I want to spend time with these folks?

Because, the reason they are the way they are, is because they think the way they think.

God tells us these folks are more wise in their own eyes than in God’s eyes.

They won’t stand in the judgment.

They’re not going to sit with the righteous in the last day.

They will perish!

And you DO NOT want to go where they end up.

Their actions and their words tell us what kind of people they are, and what kind of advice they’d give us.

What about Psalm 1 makes it so relevant here?

Psalm 1 is called the preamble to the book of Psalms.

That is, it serves as an introduction to the entire book.

What is said in Psalm 1 is relevant to all the rest of the book of Psalms.

Reverend Charles Haddon Spurgeon viewed it this way:

The matter of the first Psalm, which may be looked upon, in some respects, as the text upon which the whole of the Psalms make up a divine sermon.

The psalms begin with these words: “Blessed is the man.”

In Psalm 1, God addresses man’s most basic question: How can I be happy (blessed, fortunate, prosperous, favored by God) in this life?

Is this true?

Does God really want us to be blessed, fortunate, prosperous, favored by God?

Absolutely!

And this happiness is not temporary, but perpetual.

The word translated blessed is plural in the original Hebrew.

That is, it means perpetual blessings.

It can be read blessedness’s or happiness’s.

So how can I be happy, truly happy?

Psalm 1 is called a wisdom psalm because we learn that happiness results from our choice to follow God’s direction of life.

In this psalm the writer sets forth two ways or two directions in life.

One is the right way that leads to happiness,

and the other is the wrong way that leads to misery.

The Right Way

Psalm 1:1–3
Blessed is the man that walketh not in the counsel of the ungodly, nor standeth in the way of sinners, nor sitteth in the seat of the scornful. But his delight is in the law of the Lord; and in his law doth he meditate day and night. And he shall be like a tree planted by the rivers of water, that bringeth forth his fruit in his season; his leaf also shall not wither; and whatsoever he doeth shall prosper.

Psalm 1 captures a basic fundamental teaching found in both the Old and New Testaments.

In the Old Testament God teaches His people that one’s choice will determine both the direction and the outcome of your life.

I call heaven and earth to record this day against you, that I have set before you life and death, blessing and cursing: therefore choose life, that both thou and thy seed may live. (Deuteronomy. 30:19)

In the New Testament, Jesus’ message to the crowds is to choose the right way in life:

Enter ye in at the strait gate: for wide is the gate, and broad is the way, that leadeth to destruction, and many there be which go in thereat: because strait is the gate, and narrow is the way, which leadeth unto life, and few there be that find it. (Matthew. 7:13–14)

Choosing the Right Path

First, in Psalm 1:1 we learn that happiness comes by choosing to walk on a righteous path.

This determination is directly connected to other people.

Each line in this verse tells us to avoid the wrong kinds of interpersonal relationships.

Your friends and your enemies make all the difference in your life.

Notice what this verse says: “Blessed is the man that walketh not in the counsel of the ungodly.”

Choosing the righteous path includes refusing advice from those who hold godless values and whose moral choices violate the laws of God.

The second line goes a step further: “nor standeth in the way of sinners.”

It is one thing to listen to wicked counsel. It is another to decisively side with that viewpoint. Instead, the happy person refuses to follow the worldly crowd.

You don’t see him “hanging out” with those who pursue sin as a lifestyle.

Finally, he refuses to sit and associate with those whose conversations mock and curse God: “nor sitteth in the seat of the scornful.”

If you want to be miserable, make your best friends those who are scornful, critical and disrespectful.

The three verbs—walkstand and sit—show the slippery slope of evil. Evil is not passive. It is ever descending. The longer you go, the worse you get. A pattern of evil choices causes a downward spiral in character that leads to destruction.

But we must also be very careful with our interpretation of this “right way.”

“Our interpretation” and “Our actions which follow our interpretation,” can go horribly wrong, and the only thing created is useless division inconsistent with the Words and essential Gospel Teachings of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.

Jesus took His disciples into the much hated, thoroughly avoided Samaria to interact with the Woman at the Well with the message: How to Worship God.

John 4:15-25 Amplified

15 The woman said to Him, “Sir, give me this water, so that I will not get thirsty nor [have to continually] come all the way here to draw.” 16 At this, Jesus said, “Go, call your husband and come back.” 17 The woman answered, “I do not have a husband.” Jesus said to her, “You have correctly said, ‘I do not have a husband’; 18 for you have had five husbands, and the man you are now living with is not your [a]husband. You have said this truthfully.” 19 The woman said to Him, “Sir, I see that You are a prophet. 20 Our fathers worshiped on this mountain, but you Jews say that the place where one ought to worship is in Jerusalem [at the temple].” 21 Jesus replied, “Woman, believe Me, a time is coming [when God’s kingdom comes] when you will worship the Father neither on this mountain nor in Jerusalem. 22 You [Samaritans] do not know what you worship; we [Jews] do know what we worship, for salvation is from the Jews. 23 But a time is coming and is already here when the true worshipers will worship the Father in spirit [from the heart, the inner self] and in truth; for the Father seeks such people to be His worshipers. 24 God is spirit [the Source of life, yet invisible to mankind], and those who worship Him must worship in spirit and truth.” 25 The woman said to Him, “I know that Messiah is coming (He who is called Christ—the Anointed); when that One comes, He will tell us everything [we need to know].”

Jesus sat with and shared a meal with the hated, thoroughly avoided ones.

Matthew 9:9-13 Amplified

Matthew Called

As Jesus went on from there, He saw a man named Matthew (Levi) sitting in the tax collector’s booth; and He said to him, “Follow Me [as My disciple, accepting Me as your Master and Teacher and walking the same path of life that I walk].” And Matthew got up and followed Him.

10 Then as Jesus was reclining at the table in Matthew’s house, many tax collectors and [a]sinners [including non-observant Jews] came and ate with Him and His disciples. 11 When the Pharisees saw this, they asked His disciples, “Why does your Master eat with tax collectors and sinners?” 12 But when Jesus heard this, He said, “Those who are healthy have no need for a physician, but [only] those who are sick. 13 Go and learn what this [Scripture] means: ‘I desire compassion [for those in distress], and not [animal] sacrifice,’ for I did not come to call [to repentance] the [self-proclaimed] righteous [who see no need to change], but sinners [those who recognize their sin and actively seek forgiveness].”

John 21:15-17 Amplified

The Love Motivation

15 So when they had finished breakfast, Jesus said to Simon Peter, “Simon, son of John, do you love Me more than these [others do—with total commitment and devotion]?” He said to Him, “Yes, Lord; You know that I [a]love You [with a deep, personal affection, as for a close friend].” Jesus said to him, “Feed My lambs.” 16 Again He said to him a second time, “Simon, son of John, do you love Me [with total commitment and devotion]?” He said to Him, “Yes, Lord; You know that I love You [with a deep, personal affection, as for a close friend].” Jesus said to him, “Shepherd My sheep.” 17 He said to him the third time, “Simon, son of John, do you love Me [with a deep, personal affection for Me, as for a close friend]?” Peter was grieved that He asked him the third time, “Do you [really] [b]love Me [with a deep, personal affection, as for a close friend]?” And he said to Him, “Lord, You know everything; You know that I love You [with a deep, personal affection, as for a close friend].” Jesus said to him, “Feed My sheep.

John 10:11-18 Amplified

11 [a]I am the Good Shepherd. The Good Shepherd [b]lays down His [own] life for the sheep. 12 But the hired man [who merely serves for wages], who is neither the shepherd nor the owner of the sheep, when he sees the wolf coming, deserts the flock and runs away; and the wolf snatches the sheep and scatters them. 13 The man runs because he is a hired hand [who serves only for wages] and is not concerned about the [safety of the] sheep. 14 I am the Good Shepherd, and I know [without any doubt those who are] My own and My own know Me [and have a deep, personal relationship with Me]— 15 even as the Father knows Me and I know the Father—and I lay down My [very own] life [sacrificing it] for the benefit of the sheep. 16 I have [c]other sheep [beside these] that are not of this fold. I must bring those also, and they will listen to My voice and pay attention to My call, and they will become [d]one flock with one Shepherd. 17 For this reason the Father loves Me, because I lay down My [own] life so that I may take it back. 18 No one takes it away from Me, but I lay it down voluntarily. I am authorized and have power to lay it down and to give it up, and I am authorized and have power to take it back. This command I have received from My Father.”

The essential key here to properly contextualizing and applying the essential lessons from the Word of God from Psalm 1 into our New Covenant times is:

Hungering for God’s Word – ALL OF IT!

Second, Psalm 1:2 declares that happiness comes by developing a strong appetite for God’s Word.

We learn to enjoy the Bible by nurturing the disciplined habit of meditation.

Meditation involves a 24/7— “day and night”—focus on the Scripture.

This means seeking to understand the Bible’s meaning as well as its application to us personally.

The Spirit of God makes the Word of God satisfying to the soul of man.

The Scriptures are “sweeter than honey” (Psalm. 119:103) and “more to be desired [desirable] are they than gold” (Psalm. 19:10).

In some contexts, the word meditate can be translated growl or groan or moan.

It conveys the idea of muttering.

Perhaps you know someone who walks around mumbling to himself.

We tend to view such behavior as socially odd.

But the reality is that all of us talk to ourselves inside our heads all the time.

There is a mental discussion going on continuously.

Some people simply express parts of their dialogue audibly.

This mental conversation is meditation.

God blesses us as we mull over ALL OF HIS Words, both day and night.

The reason this way of life makes one so happy is that is fulfills the purpose for which we were created.

God’s first command to man was to “be fruitful” (Genesis. 1:28).

Psalm 1 describes the happy man as being “like a tree planted by the rivers of water, that bringeth forth his fruit in his season; his leaf also shall not wither; and whatsoever he doeth shall prosper” (Psalm 1:3).

Fruit bearing is the result of deep roots’ finding an abundant supply of nourishment from underground streams of water. God’s Word is an all-sufficient, eternal supply of empowering grace for all of life.

Even during difficult, seemingly barren times, the Word will sustain life.

A fruitful life is a blessed life.

So, David states that God’s way to happiness is being in, but separated from the world, saturated with the Word, and fruitful and successful in doing God’s will.

Jesus’ High Priestly Prayer for us as we navigate through our seasons today;

John 17:13-21 Amplified

The Disciples in the World

13 But now I am coming to You; and I say these things [while I am still] in the world so that they may experience My joy made full and complete and perfect within them [filling their hearts with My delight]. 14 I have given to them Your word [the message You gave Me]; and the world has hated them because they are not of the world and do not belong to the world, just as I am not of the world and do not belong to it. 15 I do not ask You to take them out of the world, but that You keep them and protect them from the evil one. 16 They are not of the world, just as I am not of the world. 17 Sanctify them in the truth [set them apart for Your purposes, make them holy]; Your word is truth. 18 Just as You commissioned and sent Me into the world, I also have commissioned and sent them (believers) into the world. 19 For their sake [e]I sanctify Myself [to do Your will], so that they also may be sanctified [set apart, dedicated, made holy] in [Your] truth.

20 “I do not pray for these alone [it is not for their sake only that I make this request], but also for [all] those who [will ever] believe and trust in Me through their message, 21 that they all may be one; just as You, Father, are in Me and I in You, that they also may be one in Us, so that the world may believe [without any doubt] that You sent Me.

The Wrong Way

Psalm 1:4–6
The ungodly are not so: but are like the chaff which the wind driveth away. Therefore the ungodly shall not stand in the judgment, nor sinners in the congregation of the righteous. For the Lord knoweth the way of the righteous: but the way of the ungodly shall perish.

David goes on in verse 4 to contrast the way of the righteous with the way of the ungodly: “the ungodly are not so.”

Reverend Charles Haddon Spurgeon makes a powerful point when he notes that the Hebrew proposes a double negative:

“‘Not so the ungodly, no so.’ Oh! how terrible is it to have a double negative put upon the promises! and yet this is just the condition of the ungodly.”

Ungodliness will never, never prosper!

In the end ungodly people’s lives are deemed as “chaff.”

In other words, they are worthless, lifeless and useless.

They will be driven away by the wind of God’s judgment.

They will not dwell with the people of God in the congregation of the righteous (Psalm 1:5).

At the end of the passage, the psalmist sets forth two directions

—the way of the righteous and the way of the ungodly; two decisions

—to meditate on God’s Word or to listen to ungodly counsel; and two destinies

—the righteous will enjoy God’s presence forever, but the ungodly will perish.

So let me repeat: It pays to pay attention to who you pay attention to.

BUT who SHOULD I pay attention to?

Well, the reason Jesus created the church was so that we could look to each other for support and advice.

When you listen to the counsel of fellow Christians, you at least stand a good chance of getting Biblical advice.

But it’s interesting. The first people Rehoboam consulted were the Elders.

1Kings 12:6 tells us “Then King Rehoboam consulted the elders who had served his father Solomon during his lifetime. ‘How would you advise me to answer these people?’ he asked.”

Now, of course, these were not exactly “Elders” like a church might have.

They were older men whom Solomon had trusted for advice when he was King.

But older men have always the standard advisors in the Bible.

When Moses was leading the people out of Egypt, he was helped by 70 Elders of Israel, and these 70 Elders were often part of God’s dealing with His people because these 70 men were recognized leaders and wise men in Israel. Numbers 11:16, 25

Later, Elders of each city would sit at the city gates, and they’d act as judges in civil disputes. Deuteronomy 25:7

And throughout much of Israel’s history, the Elders of the people often guided Israel both in good and bad ways.

And that continued once God began His church.

Paul told the two young preachers – Timothy and Titus – to appoint Elders in their churches.

But these Elders were not just to be older men.

“An elder must be blameless, the husband of but one wife, a man whose children believe and are not open to the charge of being wild and disobedient.

Since an overseer is entrusted with God’s work, he must be blameless— not overbearing, not quick-tempered, not given to drunkenness, not violent, not pursuing dishonest gain. Rather they must be hospitable, one who loves what is good, who is self-controlled, upright, holy and disciplined.

He must hold firmly to the trustworthy message as it has been taught, so that they can encourage others by sound doctrine and refute those who oppose it.” Titus 1:6-9

When God began His church, He intended that Elders, both ordained and Laity, should be the ultimate “advisors” for church.

They had to be men with a proven track record.

They had to be good husbands and fathers.

They had to have a good reputation in the community.

AND they had to be men who stood firmly with good doctrine because their main job was

“… encourage others by sound doctrine”

“… and refute those who oppose it”

That’s why it is so critical for a church to prayerfully consider who gets to be an Elder.

These men are the guardians of Christ’s bride/ His church.

They stand beside the preacher to do the work of the ministry.

They stand before the congregation to lead.

And they are here to help give you and I Godly advice when we need it.

And they can be counted on to give good advice because…

· they are good fathers

· they are good husbands

· They are men you can trust to stand with God’s Word.

But my point is this:

When you need advice… look to God’s people (that’s why God formed the church)

When you need serious advice… look to your Elders (that’s why God formed the Eldership)

If you follow this guideline in your life God will protect the things that are important to you.

If you don’t, you may end up listening to foolish people– whose advice may cost you everything you hold precious.

Now Solomon gave one more piece of guidance to his son Rehoboam that Rehoboam ignored:

“Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight. Do not be wise in your own eyes; fear the LORD and shun evil.” Proverbs 3:4-7

In this entire story in I Kings 12, we don’t find ONE time that Rehoboam even prayed to God.

He never consulted the priests at the Temple.

He never visited one of the Prophets God used to proclaim His will.

Even when he visited with the Elders for advice, He wasn’t really looking for God’s will.

Rehoboam was looking for someone who would agree with what he’d already decided to do.

One person observed: “When we ask others for their advice, we are usually, actually, looking for a willing accomplice.” Marquis de la Grange

Rehoboam was looking for a willing accomplice.

He wasn’t looking for God’s advice or counsel.

He probably had already made up his mind what he wanted to do and his friends only confirmed the decision he’d already made.

But why would Rehoboam ignore God?

Why seek his own counsel rather than God’s?

Perhaps because Rehoboam thought he was wiser than both his father and God.

He didn’t think God would be wise enough for him to do what was best for him?

Why would he want to entrust his life to the wisdom of God when he did not believe God’s wisdom would be wise enough for him in the important matters.

Why would we want to entrust our life to the wisdom of God when/if we do not believe God’s wisdom will/would be wise enough for us in our critical times?

But Paul wrote: “… I am not ashamed, for I know whom I have believed and am persuaded that

He is [wise enough, able enough {my emphasis}] able to keep what I have committed to Him until that Day.” 2 Timothy 1:12 (NKJV)

In other words, Paul believed that no matter what happened in his life – if he entrusted that which was precious to God’s hands – God would take care of it.

Finally,

Anne Graham Lotz, in her book Just Give Me Jesus declared:

“No means of measure can define God’s limitless love…

No far-seeing telescope can bring into visibility the coastline of His shoreless supply…

No barrier can hinder Him from pouring out His blessings…

· He forgives and He forgets

· He creates and He cleanses.

· He restores and He rebuilds

· He heals and He helps

· He reconciles and He redeems

· He comforts and He carries

· He lifts and He loves.

He is the God of the 2nd chance, the fat chance, the slim chance…

Just give me Jesus!

He makes change possible!

Just give me Jesus.

Just give me His counsel and guidance.

Just give me His will and way for my life.”

And the best way to have those blessings in your life?

Is to give your not so “wise” self to GOD’S “WISER SELF” completely.

In the name of God, the Father, and God the Son and God the Holy Spirit,

Let us Pray,

Lord of wisdom, I sometimes finding understanding my life and my connection to the Bible to be far too difficult. I know you want me to apply your word to my life. I thank you for giving me your word so I can grow in my relationship with you. Help me to grasp what you want me to know as I read your revealed word. Open my eyes to see the wonderful truths in your instructions. Be my teacher, so I can live and obey your word. Thank you for your much wiser advice. Amen.

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What does it mean to have Quality of Life? The Vanity of our Contemplating a Life without God. Ecclesiastes 1:12-14

“Vanity of vanities,” says the Preacher.
“Vanity of vanities! All [that is done without God’s guidance] is vanity [futile, meaningless—a wisp of smoke, a vapor that vanishes, merely chasing the wind].”

Prosperity Comes from the Lord.

A Song of [a]Ascents. Of Solomon.

127 Unless the Lord builds the house,
They labor in vain who build it;
Unless the Lord guards the city,
The watchman keeps awake in vain.

What does it mean to you to have “good” and “safe and sound” quality of life?

A Sound Mind? Good health? Harmony at home? A happy heart? Financial security? Freedom of speech and worship? A fulfilling career? Grateful and content children? A meaningful marriage? A life of significance? A Soul which boasts of its “perfect balance between Shalom and Chaos? Peace with God?

An interesting question to ask considering the turmoil which is probably swirling around your existence right now from the gravity of Supreme Court decisions to their ramifications and the socio-economic realities we live in.

Undoubtedly, the balance between these realities and our peace of mind makes up a life we have to decide is worth the living in and through —a quality life?

“Vanity of Vanities,” says the Preacher ….

What do we say of the Quality of Life of “a Preacher” who starts his message with “Vanity of Vanities?” Throws words such as “meaningless, “a wisp of smoke that vanishes, a wisp of smoke which merely wastes its time chasing after the wind which it can never catch, nor can it ever hope to grasp onto.”

What is the quality of this “Preachers” relationship with the world around him?

Moreover, the quality of our lives is mightily determined by the quality of our relationships.

Who we spend time with is who we become.

If we spend time with those wise in their finances, and if we pay attention, we can become wise in our own finances.

If we are intentional in our faith, we will worship with those of great faith.

The Quality of our life is a reflection of the Quality of our relationships.

Walk with the wise and become wise, for a companion of fools suffers harm.  Proverbs 13:20

So, how is your relational portfolio?

Are you diversified with people who bring value to all aspects of your life?

Conversely, are you intentional to invest time and interest in those who look to you for guidance?

Quality of life flows not from just receiving wisdom, but from giving wisdom.

Quality of Wisdom works in both directions for the good of the relationship.

What would we say about the Quality of our Life, the Quality of our Wisdom?

What does the “Preacher” have to say about the Quality of his Life’s Wisdom?

Ecclesiastes 1:12-14Amplified Bible

The Futility of Wisdom

12 I, the Preacher, have been king over Israel in Jerusalem. 13 And I set my mind to seek and explore by [man’s] [a]wisdom all [human activity] that has been done under heaven. It is a miserable business and a burdensome task which [b]God has given the sons of men with which to be busy and distressed.  14 I have seen all the works which have been done under the sun, and behold, all is vanity, a futile grasping and chasing after the wind.

The Word of God for the Children of God. Gloria! In Excelsis Deo! Alleluia! Amen.

What would we say about the Quality of our Life, the Quality of our Wisdom?

How well do we relate or not relate to these words of “the Preacher” spoken to who knows who and when and who knows why some three thousand years ago?

Is there. or is there not a certain degree of resonance raising up within you in this moment when you read and confront the title: “The Futility of Wisdom?”

Whose Quality of Wisdom do you think is the most vain and the most futile?

His own or His God’s?

If you had to consider your own answer on this day in 2022, whose quality of Wisdom, whose Quality of Life, would be the most vain and the most futile?

The Quality of Your Wisdom drawn from the Quality of Your Life?

The Quality of Your God’s Wisdom drawn the Quality of His Life?

The harder we try to understand the book of Ecclesiastes, the greater is our own temptation to immediately chime in with the author’s refrain: “all is vanity!”

Yet, somewhere along the way, we might realize our life is going somewhere, somehow and by some means by ours or someone else’s reason, rationale.

After all, the “Preacher’s” life is not a mystery novel, where it is considered cheating to peep at the last chapter to find out who did what and why: it is in fact, a legitimate part of the wisdom writings of the written Word of God!

ECCLESIASTES 1:2. “Vanity of vanities, saith the Preacher, vanity of vanities; all is vanity.”

This is the refrain throughout the book. It speaks of the Quality of emptiness, futility, meaninglessness, something of a whole lot of the purest nothingness.

ECCLESIASTES 1:12. “I the Preacher was king over Israel in Jerusalem.”

In a more traditional understanding of the authorship of Ecclesiastes, we have here an older version of Solomon, who having strayed from God’s path, is now writing after having tried everything which a ‘life without God’ has to offer.

ECCLESIASTES 1:13. “And I gave my heart to seek and search out by wisdom concerning all things that are done under heaven: this sore travail hath God given to the sons of men to be exercised therewith.”

Solomon was more than just an interested or casual observer of the restlessness of surviving the Quality of the life he was living and struggling every single day to get through: he quite literally sought to “seek and search out by wisdom.”

After all, he says, this is the “sore travail” that God has given to us “sons of men” since the Fall (cf. Genesis 3:19).

The whole creation has been subjected to ‘vanity, not willingly, but by reason of Him who hath subjected the same IN A LIVING VIBRANT HOPE’ (Romans 8:20).

ECCLESIASTES 1:14. “I have seen all the works that are done under the sun; and behold, all is vanity and vexation of spirit.”

To the “Preacher,” To seek the Quality of Life in a life with God versus to seek quality of life in a life without God is just: “vanity” and a chasing after the wind.

ECCLESIASTES 2:18-19. “Yea, I hated all my labour which I had taken under the sun: because I should leave it unto the man that shall be after me. And who knows whether he shall be a wise man or a fool? Yet shall he have rule over all my labour wherein I have labored, and wherein I have shewed myself wise under the sun, This also is vanity.”

The Quality of Our Thoughts determines the Quality of Our Life!

The Quality of Our Thoughts determines the Quality of Our Wisdom!

The Quality of Our Thoughts and the Quality of Our Wisdom determines the Direction of our Future Generations – goes a very long way to determining the Quality (vanity)of their thoughts and The Quality (vanity) of their Wisdom.

If the writer of Ecclesiastes is Solomon, then one might wonder if he had some ‘Quality” ideas of what a mess his son Rehoboam would make of the kingdom?

Solomon’s successor knowingly refused the counsel of the aged, and he spoke roughly unto the children of Israel, precipitating the division of the kingdom, (cf. 1 Kings 12:13-17).

ECCLESIASTES 2:20-21. “Therefore, I went about to cause my heart to despair of all the labour which I took under the sun. For there is a man whose labour is in wisdom, and in knowledge, and in equity; yet to a man that hath not labored therein shall he leave it for his portion. This also is vanity and a great evil.”

The very thought of one’s hard-earned wisdom being squandered by a future generation makes one regret ever having made the effort to gain the wisdom.

“Evil” probably speaks of the unfairness of it all.

ECCLESIASTES 2:22. “For what hath man of all his labour, and of the vexation of his heart, wherein he hath labored under the sun?

“Labor” speaks of effort. “Vexation” speaks of stress.

This is a question expecting the “only obvious” answer ‘None!’

Jesus asked a similar question, ‘What?’:

Mark 8:34-36Amplified Bible

34 Jesus called the crowd together with His disciples, and said to them, “If anyone wishes to follow Me [as My disciple], he must deny himself [set aside selfish interests], and [a]take up his cross [expressing a willingness to endure whatever may come] and follow Me [believing in Me, conforming to My example in living and, if need be, suffering or perhaps dying because of faith in Me]. 35 For whoever wishes to save his life [in this world] will [eventually] lose it [through death], but whoever loses his life [in this world] for My sake and the gospel’s will save it [from the consequences of sin and separation from God]. 36  For what does it benefit a man to gain the whole world [with all its pleasures], and forfeit his soul?

‘What shall it profit a man if he gains the whole world, then loses his soul?’ (Luke 9:25).

The rich man who built more and bigger barns for his worldly abundance is aptly named ‘Fool! This night your soul will be required of thee: then whose will these things be which thou hast provided?’ (Luke 12:20).

ECCLESIASTES 2:23. “For all his days are sorrows, and his travail grief; yea, his heart taketh not rest in the night. This also is vanity.”

Hard work, stress, sleepless nights. A recipe for burnout! The futility of it all!

Earlier in his life, Solomon wrote, ‘The fear of the LORD is the beginning of knowledge’ (Proverbs 1:7).

Then, after all the excursions of this later book, ‘the conclusion of the whole matter’ will be the same. ‘Fear God and keep His commandments: for this is the whole duty of man’ (Ecclesiastes 12:13).

If all this worldly labour is meaningless, Paul suggests: ‘Set your affection on things above, not on things on the earth. For you are dead, and your life is now hidden with Christ in God’ (Colossians 3:2-3).

Above all, quality of life results from your relationship with Christ.

He is life itself and everything good in life flows from Him.

Walking with God means you are ready to receive a miracle at any point in time. 

When you grow in the Quality of your personal relationship with Jesus—it will definitely, decisively affect the Quality of growth of your other relationships.

Quality Relationship building in heaven builds Quality relationships on earth.

Ultimately, Jesus is the Quality of life to model and follow.

The Quality of the resurrected life of Christ gives you the Quality of spiritual stamina to experience a “good and wise and sound” quality of abundant life.

In the name of God, the Father and God the Son and God the Holy Spirit,

Let us Pray,

Lord, my Rock and Redeemer, thank you that you are my ever-present help in times of trouble. When all I can see around me is trouble, help me to trust in what is unseen. Remind me of the truth of your power, that you surround me, and no one can pluck me from your hand. Remove my fear and replace it with wholehearted faith in you, my God. You are the King of ALL ages, immortal, invisible, the only God. To you be honor and glory forever and ever. Through Jesus Christ, our Lord, Gloria! In Excelsis Deo! Alleluia! Alleluia! Alleluia! Amen.

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What Does the Bible Teach us About Sexual Orientation? What is our God’s Answer for the Complex Question of our Sexual Orientation? Genesis 1:26-28

When a baby is born, the first thing usually said is, “It’s a boy!” or “It’s a girl!”

The sex of a child is based on biology-anatomy and chromosomes. But, for some individuals, their sense of gender does not always match their sex.

That mismatch was brought to our attention in 2015 when Olympic superstar Bruce Jenner announced that he no longer wanted to be Bruce. Several months later he was introduced on the front cover of Vanity Fair as Caitlyn Jenner.

That same year, same sex marriage was legalized in all fifty states on June 26, 2015, by an act of the United States Supreme Court.

Who would have thought that momentous decision was possible but just a few short years earlier?

But the speed at which our culture’s view on gender and sexuality has changed with lightning speed.

I remember reading that the Facebook in the U.S. used to list over 50 gender alternatives, if the word ‘alternatives’ are the right terminology whereas in the United Kingdom. a person has over 70 gender alternatives!

However, I believe that now one is able to custom list one’s gender preference throughout social media. So, I do not know how many options there are today?

When I was praying and considering what topic my devotional time to today, I felt directed to this one on Sexual Orientation and what God has to say about it.

I believe this extraordinarily complex topic was important for us to examine in light of the current socio-cultural conditions.

Not only is there real divisive pressure in the contemporary culture to accept modern conceptions of sex and gender, but children are also being taught that at school too. “Drag Queens” are reading books to children in Public Libraries.

Where young children are involved, parents become, rightly so, very protective.

While I could write a multitude of sessions on this topic, I am going to cover it in only one session.

Therefore, this devotional will be necessarily cursory.

However, I believe, at least I pray I believe, it will be sufficient (by the grace of God) to give a biblical answer to the issue of sexual (and gender) orientation.

I have become aware of the book; The Gospel & Sexual Orientation by Michael Lefebvre (2012) and I am going to my Kindle to read it to better educate myself.

I have also become aware of the book; Gender as Calling: The Gospel & Gender Identity (2017) and I am going to my Kindle to read it to better educate myself.

I encourage my readers to read them to better educate and inform themselves.

I should also mention that I have no University Degrees, expertise in medicine, biological sciences, or any branch of social work or psychology or counseling.

My perspective on this is this – 40 years ago, the circumstances of my life required me to “fight this battle of intimacy and orientation” with my soul.

I fought it very privately for the first twenty years with no thought of God other than extreme anger and even stronger feelings of the absolute worst betrayal.

Then, circumstances changed drastically, and I accepted Christ as my Savior.

I spent the next eight years privately trying to sort things out with God and then in 2008 I met the woman who in 2010 became my wife of twelve + years now.

There are reasons and rationales galore why I remained a bachelor for 48 years.

God alone knows them all.

God alone collected and recorded in His Book, every single one of my tears.

Psalm 56: 8 Amplified.

You have taken account of my wanderings;
Put my tears in Your bottle.
Are they not recorded in Your book?

It’s only but by the Grace of God, My Savior

– I fought the wars, I ‘bled,’ carried the scars, cried the tears and then

ULTIMATELY GOD WON!

I leave the details, for obvious reasons, strictly between my God and Me and those I have learned by time and tragedy and betrayal to implicitly trust.

I also will point out that I have no Seminary training nor Ordination license.

My training is “limited” to what I try to read and grasp in God’s Scriptures.

And so, I believe my approach to this topic is more theological and pastoral.

My concern in this devotional is what the Bible teaches about this topic, and also how we as Christians and as the Body of Christ – the church should help, counsel, those wrestling with issues related to sexual and gender orientation.

As the Body of Christ, God’s Church in the world, it is a very righteous effort to rigorously and vigorously examine the Word of God as it relates to such issues.

“One God – Father, Son and Holy Spirit – One Faith – One Baptism.” Amen!

God is absolutely Sovereign over His own Creation.

God is the Author of all life – Psalm 139:13-18 Amplified.

Turn your eyes upon Jesus
Look full in his wonderful face
And the things of earth will grow strangely dim
In the light of his glory and grace

Genesis 1:26-28Amplified Bible

26 Then God said, “Let Us (Father, Son, Holy Spirit) make man in Our image, according to Our likeness [not physical, but a spiritual personality and moral likeness]; and let them have complete authority over the fish of the sea, the birds of the air, the cattle, and over the entire earth, and over everything that creeps and crawls on the earth.” 27 So God created man in His own image, in the image and likeness of God He created him; male and female He created them. 28 And God blessed them [granting them certain authority] and said to them, “Be fruitful, multiply, and fill the earth, and subjugate it [putting it under your power]; and rule over (dominate) the fish of the sea, the birds of the air, and every living thing that moves upon the earth.”

The Word of God for the Children of God. Gloria! In Excelsis Deo! Alleluia! Amen.

Let me briefly define a few terms so that we are thinking about the same thing:

* Sex-refers to the biological classification of a person as male or female based on physical features.

* Gender-refers to the social and psychological classification of a person as male or female based on personal perception.

There are a few instances in which a person’s physical anatomy is different from his or her chromosome make-up. That is very rare, and very difficult emotionally, very difficult pastorally, and beyond the scope of this writing.

Historically, a person’s physical sex and social gender were regarded as unified.

So, a physical male was also a social male, and physical female was also social female.

Today, however, this historical view has been challenged.

A person’s sex and gender are no longer regarded as necessarily matching.

Today, a physical male may be gendered as a female, or vice versa.

That is where the term transgender comes in: a transgender is a person whose sex and gender do not match.

Lesson

What is God’s answer for the issue of sexual orientation?

Let’s use the following outline:

1. Current Concerns about the Issue of Sexual Orientation

2. Culture’s Answers to the Issue of Sexual Orientation

3. God’s Answer to the Issue of Sexual Orientation

I. Current Concerns about the Issue of Sexual Orientation

First, let’s look at current concerns about the issue of sexual orientation. Why do we even need to examine this issue?

Sexual orientation and gender identity are at the forefront of today’s culture. A tremendous amount has been written about it. Laws have been changed. The media accepts that sex and gender do not need to match for people. And as I said, even social media, like Facebook, allows people to self-identify.

People who wrestle with sexual orientation and gender identity issues often struggle very deeply, and very privately although admittedly not all do.

A Transgender Remembrance Day poster stated,

“34% of trans people attempt suicide. 64% are bullied. 73% of trans people are harassed in public. 21% of trans people avoid going out in public due to fear.”

If these numbers are accurate, even if they are not close, that is sad testimony.

Our culture has been pressing very hard, especially in recent years, to accept whatever sexual orientation or gender identity a person chooses.

However, as we consider issues of sexual orientation and gender identity, we must be sure that any answers are in complete agreement with God’s Word.

We must not capitulate to “political correctness,” social media posts, medicine, science, or psychology unless its propositions are consistent with God’s Word.

Second, notice culture’s answers to the issue of sexual orientation.

One current view promoted is sexual orientation is determined by our biological make-up. They say sexual orientation is akin to eye color or left-handedness.

And with regard to gender, transgender activist and entertainer, Chaz Bono, said,

“There’s a gender in your brain and a gender in your body. For 99% of people, those things are in alignment. For transgender people, they’re mismatched. That’s all it is. It’s not complicated, it’s not a neurosis. It’s a mix-up. It’s a birth defect, like a cleft palate.”

The Question is being asked, researched and only relatively briefly studied:

Is Homosexuality in our Genetic make- up? I have no Idea whatsoever.

Is there a “Homosexual Gene?” Again, I have no Idea whatsoever.

It is far beyond my expertise ergo I can give no answers, nor I can offer one.

I suppose it is possible that future science will more thoroughly demonstrate that the biological factors associated with such conditions are truly causative.

I suppose that even the opposite may eventually be scientifically demonstrated.

Eventually it may even be discovered that there is indeed a “gay gene,” so that even homosexuality can be said to be congenital.

Again, this is beyond my expertise, and I leave it to the scientific community to do all of the necessary research and studies and the certainly inevitable debates.

The answers to these questions are extremely important; however, I believe they do not in and of themselves call for any reform of the church’s historic doctrine of man, of human sexuality, the undeniable impact of original sin.

Another current view promoted is that sexual orientation is determined by psychological and environmental factors.

Alfred Kinsey eventually stated,

“I have come to the conclusion that homosexuality is largely a matter of conditioning.”

Perhaps this is why sex authorities Masters and Johnson emphasized,

“It is of vital importance that all professionals in the mental health field keep in mind that the homosexual man or woman is basically a man or woman by genetic determination and homosexually oriented by learned preference.”

There are people who have “same-sex attraction” (SSA).

And there are also people who have what is known as “gender dysphoria,”

which is defined as an experience of clinically significant distress due to a “marked incongruence between one’s experienced/expressed gender and assigned gender, of at least six months duration.”

Our culture’s answers to the issue of sexual orientation and gender identity are inadequate. The vast majority of people dealing with these issues still struggle.

So, then, the question: what is God’s answer to the Body of Christ – HIS Church?

Matthew 28:18-20 Amplified Bible

18 Jesus came up and said to them, “All authority (all power of absolute rule) in heaven and on earth has been given to Me. 19 Go therefore and make disciples of all the nations [help the people to learn of Me, believe in Me, and obey My words], baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, 20 teaching them to observe everything that I have commanded you; and lo, I am with you always [remaining with you perpetually—regardless of circumstance, and on every occasion], even to the end of the age.”

Matthew 10:16Amplified Bible

A Hard Road before Them

16 “Listen carefully: I am sending you out like sheep among wolves; so be wise as serpents, and innocent as doves [have no self-serving agenda].

So, what is God’s answer?

III. God’s Answer to the Issue of Sexual Orientation

Third, let’s examine God’s answer to the issue of sexual orientation.

Biblically, a person’s social gender is identified with his or her anatomical sex.

People are created by God with a male or female anatomical sex, and that sexual identity marks the person’s gender identity.

(There are, however, a very small number of people born with ambiguous anatomy, but that is echelons beyond the scope of this devotional message.)

The Bible’s foundational statement on sexual orientation and gender identity is Genesis 1:26-28:

“Then God said, ‘Let us make man in our image, after our likeness. And let them have dominion over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the heavens and over the livestock and over all the earth and over every creeping thing that creeps on the earth.’ So, God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them. And God blessed them. And God said to them, ‘Be fruitful and multiply and fill the earth and subdue it and have dominion over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the heavens and over every living thing that moves on the earth.'”

Note this passage of text introduces God’s design for humanity as “male” and “female.”

These two categories are not merely descriptive of all humans; they are prescriptive.

These are not the two outer ranges, with a gradation between them.

No, there are only two categories: male and female.

This passage of text also conflates sex and gender.

The biological classification is exactly the same as the social classification.

The reproductive and social duties of the man is presented within the same gender, as it is for the woman.

Lefebvre notes,

“Nowhere in Scripture are men or women exhorted to question their gender identity based on tastes or mannerisms-let alone their sexual orientation.”

Modern proponents for the sexual revolution say the Bible does not condemn homosexuality when it is properly understood.

They say that homosexual promiscuity in the Bible related to cultic prostitution or to rape or to pederasty.

They argue that the Bible approves of homosexual relationships, if they are true committed, life-long, monogamous relationships.

The theological problem is Scripture simply does not teach what they assert.

There are a number of passages in Scripture dealing with the complex issue of homosexuality.

These are: 

Genesis 19:1-29 (the account of Sodom and Gomorrah), 

Judges 19:1-30 (the Levite’s concubine), 

Leviticus 18:22; 20:13 (the Mosaic prohibitions), 

Romans 1:26-27 (Paul on unnatural desire), 

1 Corinthians 6:9-11 (Paul’s list of defilements), 

1 Timothy 1:8-11 (Paul’s application of the Ten Commandments), 

Jude 5-7 (Sodom and Gomorrah remembered).

We don’t have time to examine each of these texts, but I do definitely invite readers to do their own process of discernment and independent studies.

God’s answer, however, must also, by necessity, be given pastorally.

First, the Bible clearly teaches that there are only two sexes: male and female.

There are two genders, and these genders correspond to our biological sex.

Second, if you are experiencing sexual orientation or gender identity issues, please find qualified professional help, talk with someone whom you trust.

Third, grace is available to all.

All of us deal with sin and suffering in our lives.

Paul struggled with an unnamed affliction that God never removed from him (2 Corinthians 12:8-10). But God did promise that his grace was sufficient for him.

Fourth, the gospel provides the only hope for us to fulfill the Great Commission.

Luke 18:9-14 Amplified Bible

The Pharisee and the Tax Collector

He also told this parable to some people who trusted in themselves and were confident that they were righteous [posing outwardly as upright and in right standing with God], and who viewed others with contempt: 10 “Two men went up into the temple [enclosure] to pray, one a Pharisee and the other a tax collector. 11 The Pharisee stood [ostentatiously] and began praying to himself [in a self-righteous way, saying]: ‘God, I thank You that I am not like the rest of men—swindlers, unjust (dishonest), adulterers—or even like this tax collector. 12 I fast twice a week; I pay tithes of all that I get.’ 13 But the tax collector, standing at a distance, would not even raise his eyes toward heaven, but was striking his chest [in humility and repentance], saying, ‘God, be merciful and gracious to me, the [especially wicked] sinner [that I am]!’ 14 I tell you, this man went to his home justified [forgiven of the guilt of sin and placed in right standing with God] rather than the other man; for everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, but he who humbles himself [forsaking self-righteous pride] will be exalted.”

God promises the total redemption of our whole man in Christ Jesus, our Savior.

In this life, we must continually make humble use of the means of grace, gifted to us by God, to Scripturally deal with our sin, grow, mature in Christlikeness.

John 8:1-11 Amplified Bible

The Adulterous Woman

8 But Jesus went to the Mount of Olives. Early in the morning He came back into the temple [court], and all the people were coming to Him. He sat down and began teaching them. Now the scribes and Pharisees brought a woman who had been caught in adultery. They made her stand in the center of the court, and they said to Him, “Teacher, this woman has been caught in the very act of adultery. Now in the Law Moses commanded us to stone such women [to death]. So, what do You say [to do with her—what is Your sentence]?” They said this to test Him, hoping that they would have grounds for accusing Him. But Jesus stooped down and began writing on the ground with His finger. However, when they persisted in questioning Him, He straightened up and said, “He who is without [any] sin among you, let him be the first to throw a stone at her.” Then He stooped down again and started writing on the ground. They listened [to His reply], and they began to go out one by one, starting with the oldest ones, until He was left alone, with the woman [standing there before Him] in the center of the court. 10 Straightening up, Jesus said to her, “Woman, where are they? Did no one condemn you?” 11 She answered, “No one, Lord!” And Jesus said, “I do not condemn you either. Go. From now on sin no more.”]

2 Corinthians 5:17-21Amplified Bible

17 Therefore if anyone is in Christ [that is, grafted in, joined to Him by faith in Him as Savior], he is a new creature [reborn and renewed by the Holy Spirit]; the old things [the previous moral and spiritual condition] have passed away. Behold, new things have come [because spiritual awakening brings a new life]. 18 But all these things are from God, who reconciled us to Himself through Christ [making us acceptable to Him] and gave us the ministry of reconciliation [so that by our example we might bring others to Him], 19 that is, that God was in Christ reconciling the world to Himself, not counting people’s sins against them [but canceling them]. And He has committed to us the message of reconciliation [that is, restoration to favor with God].

20 So we are ambassadors for Christ, as though God were making His appeal through us; we [as Christ’s representatives] plead with you on behalf of Christ to be reconciled to God. 21 He made Christ who knew no sin to [judicially] be sin on our behalf, so that in Him we would become the righteousness of God [that is, we would be made acceptable to Him and placed in a right relationship with Him by His gracious lovingkindness].

Finally, let us be a fellowship of God’s people who love all people, regardless of the issue with which they are struggling.

It grieves my heart greatly when I hear people make off-color comments about those struggling with sexual orientation gender identity issues.

May we celebrate and love others as God first celebrated and loved Us. Amen.

In the name of God, the Father and God the Son and God the Holy Spirit,

Let us Pray,

Heavenly Father, thank you that nothing is impossible for you. Hear my prayer for a miracle. Fill me with faith that you can answer. What seems impossible to me is within your power. When I can’t think of a solution, you are still able to act. Please help me believe that nothing I face in life can compare to you. You are the God of the impossible. Neither death or life, angels or rulers, things present or future, height or depth, or anything else in all creation, will be able to separate me from your love. Through Jesus Christ, our Lord, Alleluia! Amen.

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Where God’s Charity and Truest Love Prevails. Making our Relationships Work. The Role of Sexual Intimacy in Marriage. Genesis 1:26-28 and 2:24-25.

Making our relationships work involves how we relate and connect to one and to each other as male and female… a connection involving us as sexual beings.

So, today, by the charity of God, His unconditional love, we are now going to get deeply personal and try to consider God’s design and desire for sexual intimacy.

I know that sexual intimacy is a topic that can often awaken plenty of interest.

I know, also, that sexual intimacy is a topic that raises many “red flags” as well.

I also know this topic of sexual intimacy can likewise tend to be a very sensitive, even embarrassing or humiliating subject or traumatic, even traumatizing one.

It’s about something very personal and intimate.

In a culture and economic climate that wants to turn sexuality into a source of public commodity and consumption… something still feels very personal and intimate when the topic is brought up and an effort is made to “give it to God.”

I certainly want to respect and protect that personal nature and sensitivity. 

We live in a time that prides itself on being sexually free.

Yet the reality, I believe, is that we are actually sexually conflicted.

We will not hesitate to politicize, we freely weaponize sexual intimacy in Congressional Hearings considering changes to the Roe Vs. Wade Supreme Court decision and in testimony and “political” speeches before Senatorial Hearings considering the nomination of our Supreme Court Justices.

It’s been said that what a culture tries to laugh at is what is most unresolved within it.

Our comedy is obsessed with sex because there is so much tension unresolved within us.

On Awards Shows, a man can make “very personal comments” about another man’s wife on National Television – and then “get slapped around and down.”

Our personal feelings about being sexual can elicit a mix of goodness and guilt…beauty and shame.

Sexuality is such a deep part of our identity and a deep part of our insecurity.

We live in a tension marked by both repression and obsession… inhibition and indulgence.

The only one NOT hung up in sexual confusion… is God.

God surrounds us … to speak of a gift that needs to be restored…. to speak of a gift often negated or neglected.

He says, “I made the stars… the seas… but lastly, I made you as male and female… as sexual beings.”

It’s God who created us as bodily beings. So, I’d like to stop and ask you to join me in a brief moment of prayer…and opening our hearts to God’s heart for us.

Let’s hear again the words from the first book of the Bible… as God gives poetic summary of who we are…

Genesis 1:26-28Amplified Bible

26 Then God said, “Let Us (Father, Son, Holy Spirit) make man in Our image, according to Our likeness [not physical, but a spiritual personality and moral likeness]; and let them have complete authority over the fish of the sea, the birds of the air, the cattle, and over the entire earth, and over everything that creeps and crawls on the earth.” 27 So God created man in His own image, in the image and likeness of God He created him; male and female He created them. 28 And God blessed them [granting them certain authority] and said to them, “Be fruitful, multiply, and fill the earth, and subjugate it [putting it under your power]; and rule over (dominate) the fish of the sea, the birds of the air, and every living thing that moves upon the earth.”

Genesis 2:24-25 Amplified Bible

24 For this reason a man shall leave his father and his mother and shall be joined to his wife; and they shall become one flesh. 25 And the man and his wife were both naked and were not ashamed or embarrassed.

The Word of God for the Children of God. Gloria! In Excelsis Deo! Alleluia! Amen.

From these ancient words of God, we are each poetically reminded of that God alone created sexuality…. and the potential for sexual intimacy.

It’s not like God created the first humans, went on lunch break and then came back and was like, “what are they doing? Who taught them that?!”

The original state was His idea. And how different it is from what we often feel.

Last verse (25)“The man and his wife were both naked, but they weren’t ashamed of it.”

Can you imagine that?

A nakedness of body that had nothing to hide from God or anyone…no shame.

No shame from their past.

No shame that comes from falling short of some expectations for performance.

The truth is that…

Our sexuality is rooted in God…. and reflected in…

• Our Complimentary Nature (‘male and female’)

We are uniquely created as male and female… to reflect the complimentary aspects of God’s character.

It’s helpful to ask what God says about when they become sexual beings.

When did they become male and female?

Was it when they left and joined partners? No

Was it when they united and created life? NO

At the very moment they were created…they were either male or female.

And that speaks to a valuable truth: You and I will never be or become more fundamentally a man or woman than you and I already are.

Now I acknowledge how deeply some find conflict with being male or female… some physical … some psychological…

I believe it is a conflict that is incredible deep because it is with something real… our biological nature as male and female is not something we can ever escape… but we must yet, by the charity and mercy of God, somehow navigate through.

• Creative Potential… (‘be fruitful and multiply’)

Male and Female were told to ‘be fruitful and multiply’ as their physical union could create new life.

God who is creating endows us with creative power…including the ability to create life.

Sexual intimacy is not reduced to the power and purpose of creating life… but neither can it be understood outside of that sacred power.

The command to go and multiply is not simply a matter of following an order… but reflecting the very divine order or nature itself.

In essence we are “continuing God’s creation act” from chaos into order.

It’s notable… that when God calls a people of this earth through whom he would miraculously make himself known

… what is the sign of the covenant

… circumcision… a marking out of the life creating male anatomy.

A sacred reminder that our sexuality is rooted in the Divine order.

• Covenant Partnerships (‘leave and become united’)

God describes that we were given a purpose… and a means to partner in fulfilling that purpose.

We were created as complimentary beings…able to create life… and therefore a man will leave his initial family to create a new union.

This partnership is the essence of marriage.

Now I know that some rigorously question the nature of marriage today.

Some may say that there were many forms of marriage in the Bible… the ancients would practice polygamy in which a man may have had many wives.

There were obligations to provide for the lineage of a brother who dies…by taking his wife.

The ancient cultures had some patterns that may seem strange in light of what God’s original design of an individual man joining an individual woman

… but the truth is…. that as God began to form a people… the understanding of marriage turns back to this original design… of a man leaving his father and mother… cleaving…. becoming bound to one woman…and becoming one flesh…uniting in a sacred intimacy only with her.

What is described is how the “becoming one flesh” …the physical union… consummates the commitment.

When two become one…. they then experience oneness in sexual union.

This helps us begin to understand how sexual oneness is designed for marriage… where the bonds of oneness have been divinely established.

The very nature of “passion” reflects the desire to give ourselves fully…with great fervor. Sexual Intimacy and Sexual passion are about giving ourselves physically and personally to another.

I believe it can be captured this way…

“Sexual passion is the stimulating of a God-given, God -driven longing from deep within us for oneness, for uniqueness; through the pleasure of releasing both personal and physical boundaries, leading to the uniting of one’s body and being, designed by God (Psalm 139:13-18) as a part of a lifelong partnership.”

I realize that within our current culture we have been trying to negate this idea.

The so called “sexual revolution” may have rightfully challenged the unhealthy repression of sexual desires…but in trying to ignore that sexual intimacy as that which God intended to unite us…it has instead, … been politicized, weaponized, and traumatically divided, torn apart, what wasn’t designed to be separated.

Experiencing oneness without being one deeply violates our personhood.

I acknowledge and recognize that may be hard for some to accept… and you may not agree at this point.

I don’t have the time today to engage how to consider such a truth today.

But I would suggest that through study of scripture and through prayer, the truth of our sexual nature speaks from both within us…and from around us.

The physical and personal were not neat to be separated.

Freedom is found when body and being are united…. when experiencing oneness is bound within the God created bonds and bounds of oneness.

Sexual intimacy is designed to unite us.

As Reverend Dr. Timothy Keller describes…

“Sexual Intimacy is a way to say to somebody else, “I belong completely and exclusively to you,” and if you use it to say anything else, it’s a lie. It’s a nonverbal piece of communication God designed, and it’s meant to carry a message…God said sex is a way to give yourself totally to somebody else and to say, “I belong completely and totally and exclusively to you.”

The simple truth is that no little girl dreams of the day they will find themselves in the arms of a stranger. No little boy dreams of the day they will be addicted and consumed by looking at a computer… or engaging in something rough and abusive. At our core, we were not designed for such separation of body and soul.

Our culture has invested more into the promotion of casual sex than any other idea I can think of.

We simply have to decide … is it really a progressive idea… or a regressive idea?

Do I really believe that becoming like the prevailing culture, succumbing to the prevailing social media driven peer pressure, is fulfillment of my personhood?

Godly Restoration comes with realigning the longings of being and body… rediscovering what it means that we are human beings expressed in bodies.

Our current cultural desire to try to separate physical pleasure from personal commitment….is not because we don’t feel the connection…it’s not because the facts regarding social cost aren’t clear … it’s because we have found it hard.

Self-Discipline, Self-control is hard… and it’s hard when there is such a long period between when sexual desires arise, and marriage tends to arise.

And it’s this tension which the Apostle Paul addresses.

He writes to those who are living in Greece…the city of Corinth.

And here is what he says…as captured in a paraphrased translation.

II. God’s Desire for Sexual Intimacy in Marriage

1 Corinthians 7:1-7The Message

To Be Married, to Be Single . . .

Now, getting down to the questions you asked in your letter to me. First, is it a good thing to have sexual relations?

2-6 Certainly—but only within a certain context. It’s good for a man to have a wife, and for a woman to have a husband. Sexual drives are strong, but marriage is strong enough to contain them and provide for a balanced and fulfilling sexual life in a world of sexual disorder. The marriage bed must be a place of mutuality—the husband seeking to satisfy his wife, the wife seeking to satisfy her husband. Marriage is not a place to “stand up for your rights.” Marriage is a decision to serve the other, whether in bed or out. Abstaining from sex is permissible for a period of time if you both agree to it, and if it’s for the purposes of prayer and fasting—but only for such times. Then come back together again. Satan has an ingenious way of tempting us when we least expect it. I’m not, understand, commanding these periods of abstinence—only providing my best counsel if you should choose them.

Sometimes I wish everyone were single like me—a simpler life in many ways! But celibacy is not for everyone any more than marriage is. God gives the gift of the single life to some, the gift of the married life to others.

The words of the Apostle Paul here may not sound like the greatest promotion of marriage.

In fact, the wording of other translations can sound even more like a “resignation” …as if to say “if you must get married…it’s okay” … as if Paul merely resigns marriage as a necessity for the less self-controlled.

Admittedly, it does not quite have that Hallmark Valentine’s Day card feel.

But the first verse helps us understand what Paul’s intent is.

He begins. “Now, getting down to the questions you asked in your letter to me. First, is it a good thing to have sexual relations?

While Paul certainly has reasons to see the benefits of celibacy

… we need to understand that he is beginning to address particular issues and questions raised by those in Corinth.

Other Translations. – ‘Is it good for a man to touch a woman?’… euphemism for sexual relationship.

To really understand the question, we need to remember the philosophy that was pervading the culture at the time…

Corinth…the city to which he is writing… was part of Greece…and just 40 miles from Athens.

The idea can be summed up as DUALISM = a complete separation of material and spiritual… and that which is of the earthly desires and bodily life being deemed either an enemy of the spiritual or at least irrelevant.

Out of this false separation, some conclude we can do anything with your body we would like.

Others found in this dualistic thinking a more ascetic approach to life… detach themselves from their sexuality.

This included those who were married thinking that such physical pleasure may be unfitting of spiritual life.

Such marriages are called “Platonic marriages” after the Greek philosopher Plato.

Many people married but did not consummate the marriage with a physical joining together; instead, they did that kind of physical activity with temple prostitutes and child slaves.

As some may or may not recall

…the city of Corinth had one of the most massive temples of its day… the Temple of Aphrodite…which has been uncovered and can be visited today.

It housed an estimated 1,000 priestesses who served as temple prostitutes…. A form of sacred legal prostitution.

That may sound crazy to us… the idea that a culture would invest so much to create non-relational sex…give it an almost sacred glorified place.

I wonder if we haven’t invested far more than that considering the length and breadth, height, depth and width of the reaches of technology, social media, to create our own “temples of sex”… where we try to find “virtual” not eternal life.

Satan’s great strategy, when it comes to sex, sexual intimacy is to do everything he can to hyper encourage sex outside of marriage, and to discourage sex within marriage. It is an equal victory for Satan if he actually accomplishes either plan!

So, Paul wants to make it clear: Physical intimacy in marriage is GOOD.

That may sound like the most obvious statement ever made… but I actually believe that a part of us may wonder. We need to really know that sexual intimacy in marriage is GOOD and not just a good thing but a God thing.

Whatever feels awkward in connecting God with our sexual pleasure is a reflection of something corrupted.

He wants us to stop letting sexuality become defined as something bad in itself.

Paul is not saying sex is the only reason for marriage, or the most important reason for marriage.

Paul is simply confronting their negating of sex, sexual intimacy within God’s covenant of marriage.

Our feelings about sex today, including sexual intimacy in marriage, are often still caught between obsession and repression.

…. And Paul here reminds us that neither the indulgent nor the inhibited are really enjoying true sexual freedom.

Apostle Paul concludes saying he himself embraces his circumstances of being unmarried. He was almost certainly married earlier in his life

… but is likely widowed now.

And he values the freedom to serve God’s work with the freedom this gives him.

That affirms that marriage is not an end in itself… there is a larger purpose.

He knows that sexual intimacy is not essential to life…but it is powerful…and cannot be negated or neglected.

So his advice is simple…

1. Experience sex only with your spouse

Paul writes in verse 2: …But since there is so much immorality…

“It’s good for a man to have a wife, and for a woman to have a husband. Sexual drives are strong, but marriage is strong enough to contain them and provide for a balanced and fulfilling sexual life in a world of sexual disorder…”

So Paul is saying sex only within marriage…

In a world that directs us away from relational intimacy

…. God calls the heart back to home.

This is the wisdom we hear in the Book of Proverbs.

Proverbs 5:15-19 (NIV)

Drink water from your own cistern, running water from your own well. 16 Should your springs overflow in the streets, your streams of water in the public squares? 17 Let them be yours alone, never to be shared with strangers. 18 May your fountain be blessed, and may you rejoice in the wife of your youth. 19 A loving doe, a graceful deer– may her breasts satisfy you always, may you ever be captivated by her love.

2. Satisfy your spouse’s sexual needs

Look at 1 Corinthians 7 verses 3 and 4:

“The marriage bed must be a place of mutuality—the husband seeking to satisfy his wife, the wife seeking to satisfy her husband. Marriage is not a place to “stand up for your rights.” Marriage is a decision to serve the other…”

The husband and wife have a marital duty to each other.

And in this context, that “marital duty” is sex.

Paul is saying that you and I are to satisfy our spouse’s sexual needs.

Paul says that we should not be depriving each other of what our bodies offer each other. He’s referring to the powerful DESIRE he had just described.

He’s not speaking about creating children…but of the pleasure itself.

As people who really value our spiritual nature, we may be quite comfortable acknowledging that physical intimacy is good, but perhaps a bit awkward with acknowledging, thinking, believing Creator God really intended such pleasure.

Paul not only affirms but even calls for both husbands and wives to ‘satisfy’ one another. Yes… it is a sacred means for being co-creators of life… but there is also a very necessary dimension of pleasure… of satisfying natural sensual desires.

In the Song of Songs…we hear of very sensual love…a love story shows marital sex to be erotic and personal, romantic and fun, passionate and patient.

As God’s gift to the intimacy between husband and wife, physical intimacy should be HIGHLY VALUED, THOROUGHLY ENJOYED on a REGULAR basis.

All of these adjectives will vary in diverse measures and to varying degrees…

Will our value always be the same?

No… but we can still each share in valuing it.

Will the level of enjoyment always be the same?

No… but enjoyment can always be a part.

What is regular?

That is to be defined through prayer and the comfort of the husband and wife.

So how can we develop such a sexually healthy marriage?

Ecclesiastes 4:9-12 Amplified Bible

Two are better than one because they have a more satisfying return for their labor; 10 for if [a]either of them falls, the one will lift up his companion. But woe to him who is alone when he falls and does not have another to lift him up. 11 Again, if two lie down together, then they keep warm; but how can one be warm alone12 And though one can overpower him who is alone, two can resist him. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.

Please let me mention four quick points…

But FIRST and FOREMOST, and UTMOST,

Pray God, the Father and God the Son and God the Holy Spirit into the moment.

Examine and be aware of the eternal equation: God plus Husband plus Wife

– Relational and Sexual intimacy in the Covenant of marriage always and forever begins and ends with God as Sovereign.

With God listening, and with Holy Spirit Guidance, being Husband and Wife in the image of God means you are having those “uncomfortable” conversations,

1. Confronting your SHARED sense of autonomy, individuality and uniqueness

2. Discovering and Challenging and Exploring your issues of fear and trust.

• Sex is never just about sex. It’s about connection.

3. Intentionally seek to know the other’s needs… which involves talking

4. Be considerate, intentional, utmost respectful about the sexual relationship

Finally….Paul makes one more main point…

3. Guard your relationship from the tensions and temptations which will seek to threaten it.

Paul says…we need to realize there is that which is set against us.

He warns us…there are spiritual forces who sees marriage as a sign of God’s covenant love on earth… a signpost of God…and wants to utterly tear it up.

He will try to draw every married life away from its center – GOD!

To submit to one another and to God (Ephesians 5:22-33),

to submit and to yield to one another sexually, intimately in marriage is to truthfully, faithfully, obediently step forward into God-created intimacy.

“My beloved is mine, and I am his; he grazes among the lilies.” Song of Solomon 2:16

These are poetic words of belonging, words that for an engaged couple can generate tender imagining and anticipation of what life together will be.

Lived into and lived out by a married couple, these words can hold together in intimacy what much of the world seems to determined to break apart.

Intimacy in marriage, sexual and otherwise, was created by God and is to be fervently and vigorously fought for, delighted in and also fiercely guarded.

To yield to one another sexually in marriage is to step into God-created intimacy that takes us out of ourselves and into places where the walls can crumble, and we can be tenderly vulnerable and real.

There is peace and expansiveness of heart that come with this intimacy, one that offers such glorious contrast to the confusion and momentum of the world.

We must be willing to fight for intimacy in our marriages, to fiercely guard it.

We fight for it by being attentive to each other’s hearts, by yielding to God in a way that allows us to more easily submit to God, freely yield to one another.

We guard it by being intentional, considering what pulls us from intimacy and stepping away from those places, considering what brings us life and stepping deliberately into those places.

“My beloved is mine, and I am his.”

We long to belong.

First and Foremost, unto God, our Father, God the Son and God the Holy Spirit.

Then to each other, in the image of God into which we were created.

The Covenant of Marriage, as an intimate coming together before God, offers a sense of divine connection, belonging that mirrors our belonging to the Father.

While the risk-reward vulnerability that intimacy brings is sometimes hard or scary to step into, it is such a wonderfully holy place that God gives unto us, a place of delighting in each another that echoes of our Father’s delight in us.

God’s demand is that we love each other perfectly and consider the needs of each other before our own, even in the bedroom.

We know all too well how hard it is to make marriage and intimacy work and it is no surprise that we cannot do all that is required of us.

Sometimes it feels like we can barely do any part of it.

This is the weight of sin and the work of God’s law.

When we see those failures, we don’t just need to forgive each other, we look to Christ who forgives all our sins – who forgives all our sexual sins and failures – and we embrace his righteousness as we seek to move forward.

This is the work of the gospel, peace and forgiveness in Christ that flows over to one another.

He alone empowers us to do good in all our duties.

So, we do love one another.

We do try to set aside our own needs and serve one another in Christ-like love. We live in the strength of the gospel to the glory of God, even in the bedroom.

In the name of God, the Father and God the Son and God the Holy Spirit,

Let us Pray,

Heavenly Father, the gift of marriage and its many blessings come from your loving hand. Thank you for these gifts which enrich our home and strengthen our relationship.  Continue to work your love in our hearts that we may grow in grace and our understanding of your plan for marriage and sexuality.

Give us an extra measure of charity and selfless love in our intimacy as we strive to set our own needs aside and look only to serve one another. Thank you for the grace that forgives us and spurs us forward to forgive one another when we fail.

By thy charity and mercy, do not let us lose heart in our journey and sustain us when we face overwhelming despair. Bring us your love and mercy every day as we look to honor you in our marriage, reflect your intimate love to the world.

In Jesus’ name, Gloria! In Excelsis Deo! Alleluia! Alleluia! Alleluia! Amen.

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Fulfilling The Great Commission: Convolution of Same Sex Marriage.

Ask any Christian about the biblical basis for missions, and most, if not all, of them will point to Jesus’ command to “go and make disciples of all nations.”

These famous last words from the Gospel Narrative of Matthew chapter 28 comprise what we know and have been taught as the Great Commission.

“And Jesus came and said to them, ‘All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. Go therefore and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all that I have commanded you. And behold, I am with you always, to the end of the age’” (Matthew 28:18-20, ESV).

When we look closely at this passage, we see Jesus uses almost the same word four different times: the word all.

Consider these four “alls” of Christ’s commission:

  • All authority”
  • To go to “all nations”
  • To communicate “all his teaching”
  • Empowered by his presence “all the time” (translated always)

Don’t miss the claims — they’re Bible basics, but they’re beyond enormous!

Jesus claims to have all authority in the universe to lead us on this journey.

He further claims that his teaching is the most important thing in life to follow.

Therefore, he claims that all nations need to know his teaching.

And last but not least, Jesus claims that he will be with us for all time.

Massive claims, and in the literal sense, far beyond incredible — you can’t believe them unless Jesus is God. “If Jesus Christ is who He said He was, then we cannot respond to Him mildly” (Tim Keller, The Reason for God).

When many of us think about entering ministry, beginning a new ministry or joining an ongoing ministry, becoming a missionary, we see the obstacles —

both known and unknown — both obvious and not so obvious, facing us.

Move halfway around the world to live among people who might not want us there and might never care about the message we bring?

Bring a message which in their understanding and belief system is inconsistent and even dangerous to their own way of living, moving and having their being?

Jesus said – Matthew 10:16 (Amplified)

A Hard Road before Them

16 “Listen carefully: I am sending you out like sheep among wolves; so be wise as serpents, and innocent as doves [have no self-serving agenda].

It is those phrases – “Innocent as Doves” and “have no self-serving agenda.”

Those are very scary propositions!

How do we or should we or could we interpret: “Innocent as Doves?”

Trying to get into God’s way, we can get in our own ways – bring our personal biases, interpretating our life experiences (good and bad and catastrophic), in the process bringing our anger, resentment, hard core prejudices into action.

We can let fear crowd out our faith.

Let “politically correct truth” crowd out what is clearly God’s Truth (John 14:6)

But pause for a moment and soak in this Great Commission passage.

Let the four “all’s” speak peace to your heart. 

Jesus spoke these words to give us a task and to give us courage in the task.

The Great Commission isn’t about marketing Jesus.

No matter how eloquently (or not) you proclaim the good news, gospel salesmanship won’t bring the least-reached into God’s kingdom.

These “all’s” remind us that the burden isn’t on us but on the One with quite literally and theologically, ALL OF THE AUTHORITY.

What is on us, however, is the obligation to obey Jesus’ command.

Many of us look for confirmation in a “calling.”

But Jesus didn’t call some (or any) of his followers to his mission.

Rather, he called them to himself and sent them on mission. 

If we are indeed 100% genuinely, truthfully, walking with Jesus, this Great Commission command is absolutely incumbent on us all.

Think of it as an implied fifth “all” — a command for all believers.

Every disciple must be a transformational disciple-maker, whether God sends you to your next-door neighbor, down the street or the other side of the world.

As you and I go — to school, to work, to the grocery store, and to the gym — to our large and small churches, our faith communities – live and love like Jesus.

Be confident in his authority. Teach his commands. Abide in his presence.

Matthew 28:16-20 Amplified Bible

The Great Commission

16 Now the eleven disciples went to Galilee, to the mountain which Jesus had designated. 17 And when they saw Him, they worshiped Him; but some doubted [that it was really He]. 18 Jesus came up and said to them, “All authority (all power of absolute rule) in heaven and on earth has been given to Me. 19 Go therefore and make disciples of all the nations [help the people to learn of Me, believe in Me, and obey My words], baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, 20 teaching them to observe everything that I have commanded you; and lo, I am with you always [remaining with you perpetually—regardless of circumstance, and on every occasion], even to the end of the age.”

The Word of God for the Children of God. Gloria! In Excelsis Deo! Alleluia! Amen.

Does the Bible indeed teach that the only “true” way it can help all people face all tomorrows in the power of God’s love is by becoming a diverse and inclusive congregation – multiracial, multigenerational and multicultural – offering all who come to enter its sanctuaries a warm, non-threatening environment to all?

What about churches choosing a different path to fulfill the Great Commission by becoming “Open and Affirming / Welcoming” rather than becoming places of supernatural transformation?

What about those many churches who see themselves as a place that, no matter where one is on their journey of faith, they are 100% unconditionally welcome?

Some within the church choose to believe the only way it can help all the people face tomorrow in the power of God’s love is by becoming a diverse and inclusive congregation – multiracial, multigenerational and multicultural – offering all who come an inclusive, warm, non-threatening environment to absolutely all.

It is believed that by being “Inclusive,” “Open and Affirming,” they show a willingness to offer koinonia, and even future membership to everyone who could be blessed from belonging because they are willing to tackle the severe faith, hope, love, issues of the day with moral passion and genuine tolerance.

Churches that are not “Open and Affirming” have, in their view, adopted a sectarian mentality that insulates themselves from the culture and causes the arson burning of bridges which connect the church with the un-churched.

On the surface that seems reasonable.

Jesus said in John 10:16-18 (Amplified)

16 I have [a]other sheep [beside these] that are not of this fold. I must bring those also, and they will listen to My voice and pay attention to My call, and they will become [b]one flock with one Shepherd. 17 For this reason the Father loves Me, because I lay down My [own] life so that I may take it back. 18 No one takes it away from Me, but I lay it down voluntarily. I am authorized and have power to lay it down and to give it up, and I am authorized and have power to take it back. This command I have received from My Father.”

By God’s Command, The Kingdom of God does include all of God’s children.

Jesus came to seek out the downtrodden, He associated with many who were considered outcasts of society, such as a prostitute, a tax collector, and a leper.

He accepted all individuals for who they are, yet not condoning what they do.

No one should ever discriminate against anyone because of their age, beliefs, gender, ethnicity, skin color, sexual orientation or perceived sexual orientation.

However, the divisive question becomes, does the real meaning behind being “Open and Affirming and Inclusive” as becoming a church that accepts not only the individual but inclusively, specifically their lifestyles and sexual behaviors?

The Authority of Scripture

Based upon the authority of the Old and New Testaments it is evident that normal sexual behavior is that which functions according to its design.

Biblical record reveals sexual union was established exclusively within the context of the male-female relationship and formalized in God’s ordinance of marriage.

The natural order of Creation and empirical Science dictates procreation for the survival of every species

From the beginning, Genesis reveals to us that God created mankind as male and female, to be joined together as a reflection of God’s love and relationship with His bride, the Church universal.

Because God’s character and nature is love, He would never create someone opposed to the design of His natural order, then say it is wrong to be like that.

Marriage Morphing

Same-sex “marriage” is about overthrowing cultural norms that have for centuries set traditional marriage apart from other household forms on the basis of ‘correctness’, tradition, legal precedent, and social-science evidence.

Marriage has always been properly and appropriately discriminatory, as when it denies a man the right to marry his mother, daughter, sister, a child, someone already married or someone of the same gender. (Read the Levitical Codes).

It is erroneous to assert that homosexuals are being denied the right to enter the marriage union when the immovable foundations of natural law dictate that marriage is by definition a heterosexual institution – a union between one man, one woman – because men and women are the only categories of human beings who can ‘procreate’, ‘bear fruit,’ ‘multiply,’ bring forth the next generations.

Limiting marriage to one man and one woman alone cannot be construed to be discriminatory.

It is a necessary condition for marriage.

The church’s moral obligation to protect the sanctity of marriage is based upon creation, nature, human physiology, the authority of Scripture, the protection of family and children, and safeguarding the ability to build strong, sustainable societies based on biblically grounded, biblically sound ethics and moral values.

In the New Testament, the oneness of male and female in marriage is a picture of the relationship between Christ and His Church.

Every Believer is to live either in fidelity within the covenant of marriage between a man and a woman, or chastity in singleness – period!

When historical Christian tradition is examined from the first century, and on through the ages, it is seen that the moral teaching tradition of the Christian church has declared any other behavior to be contrary to the will of God.

“Be Ye Transformed”

God gives anyone who humbly surrenders their life totally to Jesus Christ – the Creator, Author of Life, and Lord of the Universe – the ability to be changed if they sincerely desire to be changed. (Romans 10:9-13)

The ultimate challenge for every Believer is to live a holy life by allowing the Holy Spirit to give them a new nature and transform them

“into His likeness with ever-increasing glory” (2 Corinthians 3:18 NIV).

2 Corinthians 3:18 (Amplified)

18 And we all, with unveiled face, continually seeing as in a mirror the glory of the Lord, are progressively being transformed into His image from [one degree of] glory to [even more] glory, which comes from the Lord, [who is] the Spirit.

If Christians, in the name of Father, Son and Holy Spirit, “openly” welcome people to become a Disciple of the risen Lord and do not teach that, through

God, the Father and God the Son and God the Holy Spirit,

they have the power and ability to be changed from the inside out, and they do not have to remain just as they have always been,

living according to the old fallen nature, they negate the work of the Cross and fall far short of being “Warming, Tolerant, Inclusive, Open and Affirming” and fulfilling God’s good, acceptable and perfect will (See Romans 8:26-28, 12:2).

The Apostle Paul writes to us these words in

2 Corinthians 5:17-21 (Amplified)

17 Therefore if anyone is in Christ [that is, grafted in, joined to Him by faith in Him as Savior], he is a new creature [reborn and renewed by the Holy Spirit]; the old things [the previous moral and spiritual condition] have passed away. Behold, new things have come [because spiritual awakening brings a new life]. 18 But all these things are from God, who reconciled us to Himself through Christ [making us acceptable to Him] and gave us the ministry of reconciliation [so that by our example we might bring others to Him], 19 that is, that God was in Christ reconciling the world to Himself, not counting people’s sins against them [but canceling them]. And He has committed to us the message of reconciliation [that is, restoration to favor with God].

20 So we are ambassadors for Christ, as though God were making His appeal through us; we [as Christ’s representatives] plead with you on behalf of Christ to be reconciled to God. 21 He made Christ who knew no sin to [judicially] be sin on our behalf, so that in Him we would become the righteousness of God [that is, we would be made acceptable to Him and placed in a right relationship with Him by His gracious lovingkindness].

For the Church, becoming truly, biblically, scripturally, “Open and Affirming” is to walk in holiness [Ambassadors for CHRIST alone], fulfilling God’s Law through the ministry of reconciliation and forgiveness by loving one another.

All people must openly be welcomed into the church where their individual dignity and legal rights will be biblically affirmed and vigorously upheld.

The Natural Order

I have great difficulty with those who would say that the proof of a transformed homosexual is that they are now a “heterosexual.”

I would feel compelled to argue that God did not create man to be heterosexual (sexually attracted, oriented, to persons of the opposite sex) or be homosexual.

I believe God created humans “asexual’ in the way they are to behave towards one another until marriage. (Psalm 139:13-18 KJV,

Psalm 139:13-18 Amplified)

13 
For You formed my innermost parts;
You knit me [together] in my mother’s womb.
14 
I will give thanks and praise to You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
Wonderful are Your works,
And my soul knows it very well.
15 
My frame was not hidden from You,
When I was being formed in secret,
And intricately and skillfully formed [as if embroidered with many colors] in the depths of the earth.
16 
Your eyes have seen my unformed substance;
And in Your book were all written
The days that were appointed for me,
When as yet there was not one of them [even taking shape].

17 
How precious also are Your thoughts to me, O God!
How vast is the sum of them!
18 
If I could count them, they would outnumber the sand.
When I awake, I am still with You.

Much of human “sexuality’ is an environmental and learned behavior.

Many “straight” people assume the natural order is for a man to be sexually attracted to a woman and visa-versa.

For the Christian, I do not see any proof of that in Scripture. Quite to the contrary, I see the Bible saying that there are those who can live celibate lives.

Christians are to treat one another as brothers and sisters – first and foremost. They are one family united by Jesus’ shed blood.

“There is no longer Jew or Gentile, slave or free, MALE OR FEMALE. For you are all Christians–you are one in Christ Jesus” (Galatians 3:28-29 NLT – emphasis mine).

What is called “natural” desire in Romans 1:26-27 makes sense in a procreative sense, but not in a “sexual” sense.

I strongly believe that there are far more heterosexuals who need to have their sexuality transformed and sanctified by Jesus Christ, as there are homosexuals.

If the church is to be a spring of healing and fulfill the commandments of God,

then it must openly offer and affirm to those who desire to be set free – whether it be from their homosexuality or heterosexuality – the way found only in Jesus.

The ultimate challenge in 2022 for every Christian is to allow the Holy Spirit to transform them “into His likeness with ever-increasing glory” (2 Cor 3:18 NIV).

Christians must allow Jesus to be the healer through them by looking at others as Jesus sees them – lost sheep in need of a Shepherd.

Without condoning their behavior, they should let God “work out” the sins and failures of others.

When they do, they will gradually, and prayerfully – graciously, see the lives of literally everyone they touch healed and transformed by God ALONE, into the image and likeness of Jesus Christ thereby fulfilling God’s Great Commission.

In the name of God, the Father and God the Son and God the Holy Spirit,

Let us Pray,

God our Father, God, Author of our lives, we thank you that when you are for us, nothing can be against us. We ask you for a miracle, and we know that you will freely give us all things. We thank you, Lord Jesus, that you are at the right hand of the Father, continually interceding for us. We thank you that nothing can or will ever separate us from your love. We thank you that in all these things, we are more than conquerors through you, who unconditionally love us all. Amen.

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Parenting! Will you bless your children? Will you affirm and love them the way God originally intended? Genesis 1:26-27

Father God calls, covenants, every generation of Christians to see to it that the next generation hears about His mighty acts. God does not drop a new truth from heaven on every generation but intends that the older generation will teach the newer generation how to read and think, trust and obey and rejoice.

The Goal of Parenting: Eternity in the Everyday

God’s ordinary way of shaping children into radically committed, risk-taking, countercultural, wise, thinking, loving, mature, world Christians is through parents who themselves teach and model a God-centered, Bible-saturated “Christian” worldview to their children.

The High Calling of Fatherhood

The overarching guide for every father should be to live in such a way that his children can see what God the Father is like. Children should see in their human father a reflection — albeit imperfect — of the heavenly Father in his strength and tenderness, in his wrath and mercy, in his exaltation and condescension, in his surpassing wisdom and patient guidance.

The Deep Impact of Motherhood

Motherhood is the transmission of a God-centered, Christ-treasuring vision of life to our children. Mothers have a covenant calling that can become the long-remembered ground of faith, not just for their own children but for the untold numbers of other children who will be affected and influenced by them.

Discipline: To Train the Heart

Gracious parenting prayerfully leads children from external compliance to what socio-cultural peer pressures dictate “must be” done to joyful willingness to do what Mom and Dad tell them, ask them, to do from the kindness of their heart.

Children must learn to obey before they are able process obedience through Christian faith. When saving faith comes, the obedience which they’ve learned from fear, reward, respect, becomes the natural expression of their own faith.

Parenting in the Hardest of Times

If you are parenting in the worst of times or want to get ready for parenting in the worst of times — or simply want hope in the worst of times — look to Jesus, take this posture: brokenness because of our sin and boldness because of Christ.

Genesis 1:26-27 Amplified Bible

26 Then God said, “Let Us (Father, Son, Holy Spirit) make man in Our image, according to Our likeness [not physical, but a spiritual personality and moral likeness]; and let them have complete authority over the fish of the sea, the birds of the air, the cattle, and over the entire earth, and over everything that creeps and crawls on the earth.” 27 So God created man in His own image, in the image and likeness of God He created him; male and female He created them.

The Word of God for the Children of God. Gloria! In Excelsis Deo! Alleluia! Amen.

On the parenting front, if you are not a parent, a single, or not able to have kids, this is still for you because you were parented.

Somewhere along the line you were a kid and had parents.

There are two things I want you to do this morning, write down tips on what you need to do to help others, and write down things you were missing.

This is not to turn around and tell your parents what they did wrong, but it is a space and a place for Father God to come restore and heal you.

God is your Father and Restorer and it’s a place to meet with God.

Another thing on the forefront is to acknowledge parenting is hard.

It takes two, which is why God put us in partnership.

If you are a single parent, you know it takes a community around you.

It’s difficult and challenging.

Sometimes, mom and dad have to figure it out together.

Parenting is tough.

It is unique, but it is God’s will.

God’s plan A is family to glorify God and raise children in a way that they experience the fullness of God’s heart. 

Genesis 1:27-28, “God created man in His own image, in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them. God blessed them; and God said to them, “Be fruitful and multiply, and fill the earth, and subdue it; and rule over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the sky and over every living thing that moves on the earth.”

God created male and female and He blessed them.

It was a good thing. Then, He said go and bear fruit and multiply, and care for these precious ones that they might glorify God in the earth.

May every generation be better than the one before it.

May every generation far exceed where their parents were in that journey and find the grace in God.

There is no Plan B; parenting is Plan A for His glory.

Just a reminder, especially to parents of little kids, children are a blessing from the Lord.

Remember, God created us male and female, and He blessed them, He let them know they were worth everything to Him.

The psalmist picks this up in Psalm 127:3-5,

“Behold, children are a gift of the Lord; the fruit of the womb is a reward. Like arrows in the hand of a warrior, so are the children of one’s youth. How blessed is the man whose quiver is full of them; they will not be ashamed when they speak with their enemies in the gate.”

This is God’s delight, His design, and His desire.

Whether you are experiencing this or not as a parent, you have promises from God that He will absolutely bless your children. It is His design and desire.

The question is:

Will you bless your children?

Will you affirm and love them the way God intended?

The one thing your kids need to know is that there is a mom and a dad, two people on the earth that will be for them, always, no matter what.

No matter the ups and downs, the failures, the successes, there is somebody that values them above all others, and that’s you.

That is why we don’t compare our kids to other people. “Why can’t you be like so and so?”

Of course, it is fine to say, “Look at that attribute in that person’s life.”

To point to Christlikeness, but at the same time, you do not compare your kids to other kids.

It devalues them.

It makes them feel as if they are not the most important person to somebody on the earth.

Everyone wants to know, “Who is going to love me? Who is going to value me?”

Mom and Dad – you are that person.

There is no one else that God has chosen to be the number one cheerleader for your kids.

This does not mean your kids are perfect or don’t have problems.

It doesn’t mean they aren’t challenging or a wipeout.

They need to know there is somebody on this planet that will love them like nobody else and will advocate for them no matter what, and it is you.

That is one thing you can be for your children.

Despite of what else is going on, consistently let them know they are a blessing. 

Mom and Dad, it’s absolutely okay to brag about your kids.

You say, “I get so tired of so-and-so bragging about their kids,”

You know what?

I don’t. I’m done with that.

I love hearing other parents brag about their kids.

You brag.

Somebody must be their cheerleader.

Somebody to actually and genuinely think and to say and to communicate to them that they are the best and most loved in the world and be on their team.

Because every kid needs it, and so do you.

Children are a blessing form the Lord, let’s act like it so they can experience God’s blessing over their lives.

The other thing to mention with this is we know everybody is tainted by sin.

Each one of your kids is marred by sin as you are.

When your kids are not a blessing, like coming out of the womb and screaming, or just all over you and crazy doing stuff you cannot tolerate or understand.

When you are thinking, “I think my kid has a demon…”

No, they are born in the beauty of God, but with sin in their lives and they manifest that sin.

It is your covenant role to deal appropriately, lovingly and biblically with that, in order to lead them towards more Christlikeness.

It is a journey, and they are sinners just like you and me.

That is why we have Jesus.

That is why Jesus has to be the exact center of our hearts and the exact center of our homes, core thinking, exactly where we are leading our kids for answers.

He is a Redeemer, a Restorer, a Renewer, and an Empowerer.

He is who we are trying to be like, and He is who we are adapting to.

With Jesus as the Restorer and the Center, we always have hope, even in the most difficult and challenging situations with our kids.

The question becomes as parents, “What is our role? What does it look like?”

I have found some Scriptures that have really helped me to build faith, day-by-day, in my own stepparenting journey.

I want to share a few with you. 

Psalm 128:1-3, “How blessed is everyone who fears the Lord, who walks in His ways. When you shall eat of the fruit of your hands, you will be happy, and it will be well with you. Your wife shall be like a fruitful vine within your house, your children like olive plants around your table.”

When it says “your children shall be like olive branches” that means anointed.

They should be anointed by God.

They will be like the anointed ones around your table, living in the abundance of God.

I claim that every day, I pray it every day over Laura and Joe and over their child.

Another Scripture I pray is 

Psalm 112, “Praise the Lord! How blessed is the man who fears the Lord, who greatly delights in His commandments. His descendants will be mighty on earth; the generation of the upright will be blessed.”

Praise God! God’s children will be mighty on the earth. They may not stand on a stage; people may not even know who they are, but they will be mighty on the earth in God because this is true of those who reverently fear, worship the Lord.

Psalm 103:17 “But the loving-kindness of the Lord is from everlasting to everlasting on those who fear Him in His righteousness to children’s’ children.”

I don’t know if you do or have seen the theme, that the blessing and promises is directly linked to the fear of the Lord.

Our Covenant as a parent is to fear the Lord.

Fear does not mean to draw away from, it means to run to.

It means to acknowledge that God’s ways are right, and mine are not…

That the way I live my life, the way I think and treat Laura and Joe their child, my Grand Son, is Christ-centered, biblically centered, God honoring.

Anything that doesn’t look like Jesus is out for me and my household.

Fearing the Lord is acknowledging, keeping God central in all things so He might be the power source of life to fulfilling the promises He has over kids.

We are all God’s Children –

John 1:12-13 ” 12 But to as many as did receive and welcome Him, He gave the right [the authority, the privilege] to become children of God, that is, to those who believe in (adhere to, trust in, and rely on) His name— 13 who were born, not of blood [natural conception], nor of the will of the flesh [physical impulse], nor of the will of man [that of a natural father], but of God [that is, a divine and supernatural birth—they are born of God—spiritually transformed, renewed, sanctified].

The issue becomes whether or not I fear the Lord.

Am I responding to God?

Am I adapting to God?

We aren’t talking about any degree of perfection here; nobody on this planet is perfect or will be perfect until Jesus returns or until we meet Him face-to-face.

But there is a journey towards Christlikeness that is an absolute must, mom and dad.

Jesus must be the absolute center of our hearts therefore the absolute center of the way we parent and love.

I in no way want to impart on to my kids that I am perfect, because they know and have seen that I am not and never will be anywhere near perfection.

What I want to put on is that I am a repentant man.

I want to be known as the ‘parent’ who tries to keep Father, Son, Holy Spirit as close to the very center of my heart and my soul not as “the very best parent.”

Because if I learn how to repent, learn how to respond to God, and humble myself to others, there will always be grace for the next challenge before us. 

You tend to respond to life with strength when you see your Father’s face.

Obviously, God Himself, but parents, we have the opportunity to be that face as well in their lives.

You are their number one influencer.

Moms and Dads, you are the one who puts identity on your sons and daughters.

You are the ones that calls a woman a woman, and a man a man.

You are the ones who hugs and holds and affirms them in such a way that they don’t need the arms of another man until the appropriate time which Father God has ordained exclusively, inclusively for them.

They don’t need, and prayerfully won’t see the need, to drift off to find love somewhere else, because they are supposed to be finding it with God in you.

God calls Himself Father in the Scriptures.

God portrays Himself as male.

Though He is both nurturing and consistent and strong,

He describes Himself as Father.

Until your kids connect with Father God, you are it.

Our Parenting is about how we ourselves live our lives in God, how we have established the ‘mirrored lives in Christ’ for them to model their life after.

The only way we can succeed as parents is by the power of God’s Spirit.

Even if you are the most educated, the most enthusiastic, and the trendiest parent around, you still need God’s Holy Spirit to help you.

This is why it’s so important for us to ask the Lord to refill us with His Spirit every day, so we can operate in His power.

Also, we need to ask the Lord to help us parent our children with HIS heart—and we need Holy Spirit’s help for that, too.

Carrying God’s heart for people doesn’t come by fleshly power or effort, even if those people are your children.

We have to ask the Lord proactively to give us His heart!

Asking the Lord to give you HIS heart for your child will transform your parenting.

God’s heart for your child is the same as it is for you:

  • He’s full of love and hope.
  • He believes the best about you.
  • He never remembers the sins He has forgiven.

If you pray and earnestly ask the Lord to gradually give you His own heart for your children, you will gradually be able to love them more and more each day with a holy fervor that eclipses the stress of day-to-day childlike behavior.

You will be able to remain filled with hope not only for your child’s life, but also for the success of your day together!

Also, God’s heart will enable you to move past their “little” glitches (like temper tantrums) and still be able to treat your child with love and affection.

Second Corinthians 12:9 says, “And He said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore, most gladly I will rather boast in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me.”

Every parent is familiar with the feeling of weakness.

However, we don’t always realize that God’s grace is a very tangible force that has a very real physical, discernible, extremely powerful impact on our day.

When I’m feeling particularly overwhelmed, I ask the Lord to make His grace tangible in my life.

In other words, I’m asking Him to manifest His supernatural help in our family in such a way that:

  • Things just work and flow, and they aren’t stressful;
  • I am able to stay filled with peace and joy, no matter what happens; and
  • I can take things in stride, not feel overwhelmed, and maintain a “can-do” attitude throughout the day as I spend time with my child.

By contrast, on the days when I forget to pray this prayer,

I often feel stressed and overwhelmed.

Little things feel like insurmountable challenges. I lose courage and feel like hiding, instead of operating in the peace and power of God.

God’s grace truly is sufficient for you and me—and “grace” isn’t a pie-in-the-sky concept. It’s the very real power of God that He applies to your life to make everything work and flow. It produces peace in your home and in your soul.

Therefore, on mornings when you don’t know how you will face the “coming catastrophes of today”, Pray! ask God to make His grace tangible in your life!

Let’s not miss the opportunity of a lifetime.

Our loving Father has promised to instruct us and teach us in the way we should go and to guide us with His eye upon us (Psalm 32:8).

This promise applies to our children also!

When you consider the other verses above, we can see that God Himself has promised to disciple our children personally.

As parents, of course we can and should guide and teach our children.

That’s our covenant role!

However, if we will also ask the Lord to personally teach them, guide them, and help them stay on His path each day, then His Holy Spirit will work in their hearts. He will lead them, disciple them, and even convict them when needed.

Parents are their children’s main influencers, and it is their covenant role to create a Christ-like environment, an environment of safety and peace in our households so our kids can know how to flourish in their coming generations.

They are taking on the world, the flesh and the devil every day, as we are.

Home should be refuge. Home should be a sacred place where there is every opportunity in the world to flourish, to be successful and supported, to walk through life and talk about everything. That is what we are trying to create.

God our Father wants our days with our families to be as precious and as sweet.

However, the enemy often tries to use the cares of this world and the stresses of life to rob us of our enjoyment of that time.

On days when you feel like hiding in the closet, pray specifically as follows:

  • Ask the Lord to help you fall in love with your children all over again. 
  • Ask Him to help you delight in their sweet kisses, in their hugs, and in their learning, growth, and development. 
  • Ask Him to give you creative, fun ideas for activities you can do together… and ask Him to give you the desire to do those activities.

If your children still live at home, you already know that your years of seeing them every day are numbered.

Eventually, they will grow up, move out, and build lives of their own.

Therefore, it’s important to ask God to help you make the most of every day.

Fellow Parents, Listen, not only are we not perfect, and we’ve got problems.

It’s so important that we pray daily for our children to be humble and to submit to the Lord in all things.

In order to bear any kind of good fruit in their lives, our children will have to humble themselves under the mighty hand of God. (Even salvation requires us to humble our hearts before Jesus as we receive Him as Savior and Lord!)

When both we and our children are humble and obedient before the Lord, our family lives will naturally fall into place. God’s word—and the instructions found therein—will have first place in our hearts and homes. That means:

  • We will love and honor each other.
  • We will prefer other people as better than ourselves.
  • Our children will obey us as their parents.
  • The sweet sounds of worship and prayer will exude from our hearts and fill our homes.

But it all starts with humility, and with God’s Spirit changing our hearts to make us like Jesus, helping us to yield to all of the Father Day in and day out.

We are always working through something.

The goal is not perfection; it is a response to imperfection that is the goal.

How do we respond to imperfection?

It is what allows life, health and grace in the journey.

May we be those who respond well to the imperfections of life.

Find Jesus as central, find God’s grace is enough and we journey together as a family until death do, we part. Amen.

In the name of God, the Father and God the Son and God the Holy Spirit,

Let us Pray,

Lord, give me new eyes. Help me see each challenge as an opportunity to train my children toward right thinking and right living. Lord, give me a brand-new attitude. Remind me that any moment of the day can be a “start over” moment and a chance for an attitude adjustment. Lord, give me a new focus. Help me to pluck any worries from my mind and place them firmly in your hands. Lord, give me compassion. Remind me what it was like to be my children’s ages and have to face the struggles of growing up. Lord, give me wisdom. Help me to see my children as who You designed them to be, instead of the images I have set and locked securely up in my mind, of exactly who I’d like them to become.

God, You are my Parent. Earnestly I seek to guide myself, my family upon You!

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Parenting by Faith. Why is Faith in God so vitally important to today’s Families? Deuteronomy 6:4-9, Ephesians 6:1-4.

“UNLESS THE LORD BUILDS THE HOUSE, THEY LABOR IN VAIN WHO BUILD IT” – PSALM 127:1

Families are to be built upon loving and worshiping the Lord God with all our hearts, with all of their strength, with all of their bodies, minds and souls.

In our marriages, raising children, building up and edifying our families, are “cultural icons, technological idols” undermining such a genuine worship?

Are there practices and values we need to confess, repent of, and forsake?

As Parents, are there priorities we need to faithfully reevaluate?

Is there a place for genuine “faith in God” in our homes and in our families?

Are there “faith-filled” “faith-testing” matters we need to prayerfully discuss with our spouses and then frankly share the results with our children?

“Therefore, my beloved, flee from idolatry” (1 Corinthians 10:14).

Is there such a thing as “Painless Parenting?

Pain – even excruciating pain – is a natural part of the family process in our broken world.

Women know better than anyone that pain is how the family got started. And the aches and the pains, the hurts and the hassles, will continue to intrude into the parenting pathways through the years – whether we like it or not.

That is why a vital faith in Jesus Christ is so utterly crucial to a ‘happy’ family.

God equips us through faith to meet all of the challenges of parenting and raising a ‘Godly’ family in these 2022 days of idolatry and brokenness.

Even in the most toxic of environments which constantly challenge “Faith” in the context of faithfully holding together faithful, faith-filled mom, dad, kids.

Deuteronomy 6:4-9Amplified Bible

“Hear, O Israel! The Lord is our God, the Lord is one [the only God]! You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and mind and with all your soul and with all your strength [your entire being]. These words, which I am commanding you today, shall be [written] on your heart and mind. You shall teach them diligently to your [a]children [impressing God’s precepts on their minds and penetrating their hearts with His truths] and shall speak of them when you sit in your house and when you walk on the road and when you lie down and when you get up. And you shall bind them as a sign on your hand (forearm), and they shall be used as [b]bands (frontals, frontlets) on your forehead. You shall write them on the [c]doorposts of your house and on your gates.

The Word of God for the Children of God. Gloria! In Excelsis Deo! Alleluia! Amen.

WHY IS FAITH IMPORTANT TO FAMILIES?

Researchers at the Harvard School of Public Health recently published a paper that concludes that a religious upbringing is linked to better health and well-being during early adulthood.

At first, when I read this, I thought this was great news, since we’ll literally do anything to improve our kids’ chances of being happy and healthy adults, right?

Then I started considering the real-world reasons why we think faith in God is important to our family.

It’s a lot more complicated than our, as parents, or stepparents, just wanting, willing, them to be well-adjusted adults, though that’s apparently of a great benefit and blessing too.

So why is it important to us to raise our kids in the Christian faith?

The 2022 fact is that a lot of young people take a break from their church-going habits as young adults, “stretch their wings,” explore their life” then return to their Christian roots and practices when they get married and have children.

There’s something about raising families, bringing kids up in a church, with the habits and lessons of Sunday School, worship and service that we, as adults, feel is good for our families and pleasing in the sight of the Lord our God. (Verse 7)

Maybe part of that “something” is knowing that the Christian faith has truly provided billions of Christians for thousands of years the spiritual tools for approaching our earthly lives with courage, peace, community, hope and love.

Modern bookshelves are filled with books about how to lead healthy, happy lives (and how to raise well-adjusted kids) and the lessons look similar to those the bible has taught for millennia.

Scripture teaches us lessons about love, forgiveness, compassion, community, loyalty, praise, grace, trust, overcoming adversity, gratitude and perseverance.

We are given commandments that help us, and our communities stay on course.

We are taught to take time to pray, providing important moments of praise, and very desperately needed moments of peace, reflection, conversations with God, our Creator and our Father, which are physically and spiritually edifying and ethically and morally healing to our bodies and our souls.

And our Christian identity provides a powerful framing to understand self-worth rooted in God’s unconditional love and purpose.

These are just some of the foundational elements of our faith that create fertile ground for cultivating a life well lived.

Certainly, our faith does not guarantee an easy life.

Growing and cultivating that “most perfect of Roses” still comes with thorns.

As adolescents, teenagers, emerging adults and throughout our adult lifetimes, we will face severe, even catastrophic adversity, cultural opposition, deep loss, betrayal, societal conflict and suffering that will challenge and test our beliefs.

God’s message from thousands of years ago, from that barren wilderness is still incredibly relevant, perhaps even more so in the year of our Lord 2022.

There is no shortage of “complexities” which today’s families must navigate.

Considering our socio-economic, socio cultural, counter-cultural complexities, Families in all stages desperately need a strong faith foundation to live through the challenges and the questions, return to scripture, consult our mentors, lean deeply, heavily into our Christian communities, and recall the power of prayer.

So, we can consider faith-building as an essential part of our job as parents and stepparents “to faithfully prepare the child for the path, not the path for the child.”

Our own journey of faith gives us an enduring, perhaps even wiser, relationship with an ever-present Father, Son and Holy Spirit, along with a whole toolbox of “soft and hardcore” lessons, resources that helped us through our earthly lives.

And it gives us the gift of a community of believers who share our commitment to each other and the teachings of Jesus to love God and serve the world.

And finally, it gives us the sacred promise and Shalom of eternal life when we have faithfully’ done all we believe we can when we come to the end of this one.

It is our responsibility to pass on these awesome gifts to the next generation.

So, we faithfully try to keep our kids closely by our sides upon our own more experienced Christian journeys, teaching them the gifts of a relationship with God along with the responsibility to care for and minister to others as Jesus did.

Verse 7 We teach, lead, pray, show and then hopefully send them out into the world with their Christian toolbox abundantly filled with faith, hope and love.

And along the way, the wisdom of God, from God, becomes abundantly clear to them that “it’s not what you leave for them, it’s who and what you leave in them.”

Deuteronomy 6:5 speaks of the central truth for developing a godly family:

“You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your strength.”

Ephesians 6:1-4 Amplified Bible

Family Relationships

6 Children, obey your parents in the Lord [that is, accept their guidance and discipline as His representatives], for this is right [for obedience teaches wisdom and self-discipline]. Honor [esteem, value as precious] your father and your mother [and be respectful to them]—this is the first commandment with a promise— so that it may be well with you, and that you may have a long life on the earth.

Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger [do not exasperate them to the point of resentment with demands that are trivial or unreasonable or humiliating or abusive; nor by showing favoritism or indifference to any of them], but bring them up [tenderly, with lovingkindness] in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.

Consider Ephesians 6:1, for example: Children, obey your parents in the Lord [that is, accept their guidance and discipline as His representatives], for this is right [for obedience teaches wisdom and self-discipline].

Children, obey your Parents – How? IN THE LORD!

That means Children of God, Mom and Dad obey God, your Father –

How? IN THE WORD OF THE LORD!

Or Husbands read Ephesians 5:25-30

25 Husbands, love your wives [seek the highest good for her and surround her with a caring, unselfish love], just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her, 26 so that He might sanctify the church, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word [of God], 27 so that [in turn] He might present the church to Himself in glorious splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing; but that she would be holy [set apart for God] and blameless. 28 Even so husbands should and are morally obligated to love their own wives as [being in a sense] their own bodies. He who loves his own wife loves himself. 29 For no one ever hated his own body, but [instead] he nourishes and protects and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church,  30 because we are members (parts) of His body.

Or Wives read Ephesians 5:22-24

Marriage Like Christ and the Church

22 Wives, be subject [a]to your own husbands, as [a service] to the Lord. 23 For the husband is head of the wife, as Christ is head of the church, Himself being the Savior of the body. 24 But as the church is subject to Christ, so also wives should be subject to their husbands in everything [respecting both their position as protector and their responsibility to God as head of the house].

HUSBANDS, WIVES BE SUBJECT TO ONE ANOTHER AS SUBJECT TO THE LORD!

All of these instructions to the family wrap around the central core of faith in:

God, the Father and God the Son and God the Holy Spirit!

Do not try to build your family without faith in Father, Son and Holy Spirit!

Throw yourselves upon the full weight of His grace and mercy and say to Him:

“Lord! I know, We know, that apart from You, I, We, can do nothing but mess this gift of family up. So, I am, We are, going to hang on to You, with all of our hearts, with all of our souls, with all of our bodily and spiritual strength, with all of our minds, with both hands, with both sets of our aching and tired feet. Together, with You, I, We, will make this family work unto Your glory alone!”

Being a “Godly” family is such a big responsibility.

A family’s love, emotional presence, approval, and support for their children—from their early lives, through their teenage years, and beyond—is a significant factor in helping them to become secure, able to love and give to others.

On the other hand, a lack of love from a family can contribute to various kinds of anxiety and insecurity in relationships and in life functioning.

Fatherhood and Motherhood matters so much.

Yet, obviously, painfully, neither is an easy task.

That’s why the words of God from Deuteronomy 6:4-9 and the apostle Paul in Ephesians 5:22-30 and 6:1-4 are so foundational, edifying helpful for us.

Moses and Paul here give instructions to fathers and mothers. It’s not a detailed manual for exactly what to do in every situation. But what Moses says, and Paul says, here is fundamental, goes a long way to helping us see how to be a family.

In the name of God, the Father and God the Son and God the Holy Spirit,

Let us Pray,

God, our Father, show us your children loving devotion and grant us your deliverance. As Mothers and Fathers and Families, incline your ear and answer us, for we are challenged by great hardship. Restore us, O God of our salvation.

We ask for a miracle from heaven for our families, that we may rejoice in you. Surely your rescue is near to those who reverently fear you. O Lord, we praise you that your righteousness looks down from heaven. We praise you that you will indeed provide our families what is good, and we will see increase. Amen.

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Our Celebration of Father’s Day 2022. Honor in the Home. Exodus 20:12

Most Christians are very familiar with the verse “honor your father and mother”, but few actually know of its origin in the Bible.

The command to honor your father and mother actually comes from the Old Testament book Exodus 20 in God’s writing, giving of the 10 Commandments.

However, it is also a command that is repeated several times in both the Old and New Testament. 

Chapter 20 of the Book of Exodus serves as a powerful reminder of the intimate relationship God has with humankind.

This passage specifically reveals the intense care and concern that God shows toward His followers.

Today this chapter remains popular because of a very special occurrence – the Ten Commandments.

After venturing up to Mount Sinai, Moses brought down from God’s own hand the Ten Commandments, rules given Him directly from God.

The Ten Commandments described ten precepts for how God expected His people to behave.

This monumental moment follows after the Israelites fled Egypt. 

Chapter 19 in the Book of Exodus details how the Israelites camped in the wilderness, now living a life outside of slavery for a few months.

God informs Moses that He desires to bless the nation of Israel.

However, He also wants them to keep a covenant with Him (Exodus 19:5-6).

The Ten Commandments serve as part of that covenant.

One of these commandments spoke to the relationship between a child and parent and is a foundational guideline we as Christians still follow today.

The reason this commandment in addition to the other nine is still relevant today is because Jesus indicated such to later believers (Matthew 5:17-20).

Jesus did not come to abolish the law, but rather came to fulfill it.

We are to do our part in abiding by these commandments.

Today, there is a growing measure of controversy about whether or not the Ten Commandments are still relevant.

What is up for debate in the meaning of “honor” in the context of parents and children.

Exodus 20:12Amplified Bible

12 “Honor (respect, obey, care for) your father and your mother, so that your days may be prolonged in the land the Lord your God gives you.

The Word of God for the Children of God. Gloria! In Excelsis Deo! Alleluia! Amen.

This week I saw a posting on social media which asked these questions:

“What’s the #1 thing you want from your children?”

“What’s the #1 thing you want from your mom and dad?”

I was struck by the depth of answers along with the longing in the hearts of the children for their parents, parents for their children to love and serve the Lord.

• To know God and make Him known.

• To have the ability to see God’s presence in all circumstances.

• Respect and obedience to God.

• I want them to love God deeply in their heart leading to serving and glorifying Him with their lives.

• To be sold out to Jesus.

• For them to taste and see that the Lord is good, thus causing them to love the Lord with all that they are.

• Love and respect.

• To love and obey Jesus for themselves.

After all these thoughtful responses, one person answered the question, “What’s the #1 thing you want from your children?” this way…

• To be quiet.

One person responded to him this way, “He didn’t ask what wives want from their husbands!”

Another one quickly commented, “Sir, you know going get criticized for that!” To which that ‘father’ replied, “I am counting on it.”

He further shared his insight into his response.

He redeemed himself when he wrote,

“Being quiet isn’t obviously the #1 thing but I think it’s something as you get older you see the value in being quiet. Sit still! Be quiet when God is telling you something. Be quiet when someone with more experience is talking.”

All I could think to myself was;

“Right on!”

Behind each of these posts from parents is a longing for their children to honor them, and to honor God.

In the fifth commandment, recorded in Exodus 20:12, we discover the #1 thing God wants from His children: “Honor your father and your mother, that your days may be long in the land that the LORD your God is giving you.”

Deuteronomy 6:6-7 tells us these commands are to be inscribed on our hearts so we can impress them upon our children.

Today, as a way to get these commandments into our heads and into our hearts,

I am encouraging families in the course of their celebrations today, to spend a little bit of “Father to Children” “Children to Father” time to make a bookmark and work together at reading and sharing and memorizing these short phrases.

1. One God

2. No idols

3. Revere His Name

4. Remember to Rest

5. Honor Parents

6. No murder

7. No adultery

8. No stealing

9. No lying

10. No coveting

Listen again to the command from Exodus 20:12:

“Honor your father and your mother, that your days may be long in the land that the LORD your God is giving you.”

Our main idea is this: Honoring your parents is always proper.

After making some observations, we’ll contemplate the precept. Then, we’ll consider the promise and conclude with how to practice this commandment.

Observations

1. This is a hinge commandment.

The first four commands deal with our relationship with God. The final six relate to our relationships with others.

The fifth commandment establishes that loving our neighbor starts at home.

When we’re out of step at home we’ll be out of whack with God and others. “The relationship between parent and child is the first and primary relationship, the beginning of all human society.”

2. This is the first commandment dealing with the family.

The fifth commandment focuses on the parent-child relationship while the seventh commandment calls us to marital fidelity. Family life is the bedrock of a culture. As the family goes, so goes the nation, and the church.

3. This is given to children of all ages.

The atmosphere of the home is in large part related to the response of the children, not just to the loving leadership of the parents.

4. This command is a present imperative, which means we are to be in the habit of honoring continually.

This is not a suggestion but rather an uncompromising command.

5. This command is directed to each of us.

The word “your” is used four times and “you” is used once.

The Precept

This precept is relatively simple to understand and yet fierce in its force: “Honor your father and mother…” “Kavod” is the Hebrew word for honor and respect. The word “honor” literally means a “heavy weight.”

To “honor” is to assign the greatest possible weight to a person in terms of respect by holding them in “high regard.”

We say of someone we really respect: “She’s worth her weight in gold” or, “he’s a heavyweight.”

On the other hand, to “dishonor” means to treat someone as if they were “light or insignificant.”

To honor is to treat with distinction; to dishonor is to treat someone like dirt.

The opposite of honor is “in vain,” which means “empty, useless, and of no value.”

To honor our parents is to give them their full due weight. We’re to honor our parents because of their position, not necessarily because of their performance.

Scripture tells us eight times to “honor your father and mother.” It’s repeated so much because it doesn’t come naturally to us.

The word “honor” is the same word translated “glory” in reference to the Lord.

To glorify the Lord is to assign Him the highest and heaviest place because He deserves it.

Interestingly, the only entities we’re to honor, according to the first five books of the Bible, are the Lord and our parents.

The Dictionary of Biblical Imagery offers a helpful definition:

“To show honor entails an affective side (a feeling of respect or reverence) and a set of outward manifestations, such as gestures (bowing before or being attentive) or actions (conferring titles or privileges). All these ways of showing honor elevate the person that is honored.”

The emphasis here is on the attitude, not merely the act.

We’re to show honor in both our attitudes and in our actions.

To honor is to elevate and to esteem and to live it out in experience.

Let’s consider how this word is used in two other passages.

• Honoring the elderly is linked to honoring the Almighty. Leviticus 19:32:

“Stand up before the gray head and honor the face of an old man, and you shall fear your God: I am the Lord.”

I wonder if this verse will be in someone’s Father’s Day card this year!

• We prioritize honor according to what we prize highly.

Speaking of wisdom, Proverbs 4:8 says: “Prize her highly, and she will exalt you; she will honor you if you embrace her.”

I came across a simplified definition of honor you could use with your kids or grandkids.

It’s from the book, Say Goodbye to Whining, Complaining, and Bad Attitudes in You and Your Kids by Turansky and Miller.

• Treating people as special.

• Doing more than what’s expected.

• Having a good attitude.

The Promise

We see a promise connected to this command in the second half of verse 12: “…that your days may be long in the land the Lord your God is giving you.”

When the Apostle Paul quoted this command in Ephesians 6:2 he added, “this is the first commandment with a promise.”

Actually, this is the only commandment which spells out the benefits of keeping it. Honor is so honorable God Himself underscored it with a promise.

God is a promise-making and promise-keeping God.

It’s been estimated there are over 30,000 promises in the Bible, which 2 Peter 1:4 calls, “…His precious and very great promises…”

These promises help us see honoring your parents is always proper.

Here’s a list of positive promises from the Bible associated with this command.

1. Your life will generally be longer.

This ultimately refers to the duration of the nation of Israel in the land but also has personal application for believers as we see in Ephesians 6:3: “That it may go well with you and that you may live long in the land.”

The phrase, “live long in the land” was identified with the fulfillment of God’s blessings, not a blanket promise for a long life.

2. You will experience blessing. 

Deuteronomy 5:16: “Honor your father and your mother, as the LORD your God commanded you, that your days may be long, and that it may go well with you in the land that the LORD your God is giving you.”

The word “well” is an adverb meaning “fine, well, good, or beneficial.”

3. It is the right thing to do. It’s always right to honor our parents. 

Ephesians 6:1: “Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right.”

The Puritans taught that a child should be the parent’s echo. When the parent speaks, the child should echo back with honorable obedience.

4. It teaches respect for authority.

When honor is taught in the home, it will spread to other areas of a child’s life.

Jen Wilken writes: “This life is the lab in which God’s children learn to submit to heavenly authority by submitting to earthly authority.” 

Romans 13:1-2: “Let every person be subject to the governing authorities. For there is no authority except from God, and those that exist have been instituted by God. Therefore, whoever resists the authorities resists what God has appointed, and those who resist will incur judgment.”

Billy Graham said, “A child that is allowed to be disrespectful to his parents will not have respect for anyone else.”

5. God provides protection for those who honor their parents. 

Proverbs 6:20-23: “My son, keep your father’s commandment, and forsake not your mother’s teaching. Bind them on your heart always; tie them around your neck. When you walk, they will lead you; when you lie down, they will watch over you; and when you awake, they will talk with you.”

6. You will bring peace and joy to your parents. 

Proverbs 15:20: “A wise son makes a glad father, but a foolish man despises his mother.”

7. You will grow in wisdom and insight. 

Proverbs 4:1-4: “Hear, O sons, a father’s instruction, and be attentive, that you may gain insight, for I give you good precepts; do not forsake my teaching. When I was a son with my father, tender, the only one in the sight of my mother, he taught me and said to me, ‘Let your heart hold fast my words; keep my commandments, and live.’”

8. God is pleased when you honor your parents. 

Colossians 3:20: “Children, obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord.”

9. God will turn your heart back home.

We see this promise in Malachi 4:6, the last verse of the Old Testament, when God will

“turn the hearts of fathers to their children and the hearts of children to their fathers, lest I come and strike the land with a decree of utter destruction.”

The Dangers of Dishonoring

Disobedience to parents is listed along with other heinous sins in

Romans 1:30-32: “Slanderers, haters of God, insolent, haughty, boastful, inventors of evil, disobedient to parents, foolish, faithless, heartless, ruthless. Though they know God’s righteous decree that those who practice such things deserve to die, they not only do them but give approval to those who practice them.”

One of the signs of the end times will be the increasing disobedience of children according to 2 Timothy 3:1-2: “But understand this, that in the last days there will come times of difficulty. For people will be lovers of self, lovers of money, proud, arrogant, abusive, disobedient to their parents.”

Today, families are under attack, with parental authority being questioned and disregarded.

Years ago, the Duke of Windsor observed,

“The thing that impresses me about America is the way parents obey their children.”

The Bible says it’s dangerous for children to disobey.

While there are beautiful blessings for obedience, there are also some negative promises associated with breaking this command.

God has a deep revulsion toward anyone who revolts against their parents.

1. A shortened life. Cursing a parent was a capital offense and punishable by death. 

Exodus 21:15, 17: “Whoever strikes his father, or his mother shall be put to death. Whoever curses his father, or his mother shall be put to death.”

Proverbs 20:20 adds, “If one curses his father or his mother, his lamp will be put out in utter darkness.”

2. An uncomfortable life.

Parents, you might want to quote Proverbs 30:17 the next time your teenager rolls their eyes at you:

“The eye that mocks a father and scorns to obey a mother will be picked out by the ravens of the valley and eaten by the vultures.”

3. A cursed life. The word “diss” means to disrespect. If you diss or dishonor your parents, 

Deuteronomy 27:16 says God will bring punishment: “Cursed be anyone who dishonors his father or his mother…”

4. An exiled life. Are you aware one of the reasons the Jews were sent into Babylonian exile was a failure to honor their parents? 

Ezekiel 22:7, 15: “Father and mother are treated with contempt…I will scatter you among the nations and disperse you through the countries…”

Honoring your parents is always proper.

Years ago, I read an article from Focus on the Family and still reference it today.

The basic idea is our parenting roles change as our children grow.

I don’t have time to explain it fully but here are the four phases:

• Commander

• Coach

• Counselor

• Consultant

If you want to learn more,

Go to Focus on the Family.com to the article “The Four Phases of Parenthood.”

Putting it into Practice

As always, Jesus provides the best model of how to obey this command.

1. Jesus honored His parents by being submissive to them.

We read this about Jesus as a preteen in Luke 2:51: “And He went down with them and came to Nazareth and was submissive to them. And his mother treasured up all these things in her heart.”

2. Jesus honored His earthly mother by providing care for her.

It’s incredible that while He was on the cross, about to pay the price for all of our sins, He took the time to keep the fifth commandment by making sure His mom would be cared for when He was gone. 

John 19:26-27: “When Jesus saw His mother and the disciple whom He loved standing nearby, He said to His mother, ‘Woman, behold, your son!’ Then He said to the disciple, ‘Behold, your mother!’ And from that hour the disciple took her to his own home.”

3. Jesus honored His Heavenly Father by becoming a sacrificial servant.

Philippians 2:7-8: “But emptied Himself, by taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men. And being found in human form, He humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross.”

The fifth commandment applies to everyone, no matter your age or stage in life.

We are called to honor our parents, whether they’re alive or not. As a way to help us to put this commandment into practice, let’s focus on five questions.

Questions to Ponder

1. How are you doing showing honor to others?

According to Romans 12:10 we’re to “outdo one another in showing honor.”

2. In what specific ways are you honoring or dishonoring your parents?

Have you been treating them as distinguished or like dirt?

Do you consider their advice and their role in your life as weighty or worthless?

Proverbs 1:8 challenges us to hear and heed what our parents tell us: “Hear, my son, your father’s instruction, and forsake not your mother’s teaching.”

Proverbs 23:22: “Listen to your father who gave you life, and do not despise your mother when she is old.”

You may be asking a couple questions at this point.

Do I still need to obey my parents now that I’m an adult?

How do I honor my parents even if I disagree with them on some things?

Here’s my short answer:

The biblical command to obey your parents, when you become an adult, and the biblical command to honor your parents never expires.

Obeying your Parents and Honoring your parents is always proper.

Here are 10 practical pointers to help us honor our parents:

• Take initiative to improve the relationship in whatever increments you can.

• Recognize your parents have done some things right and some things wrong.

• Forgive them, even as God in Christ has forgiven you.

• Thank your parents for the sacrifices they have made for you.

• See your parents as Christ sees them.

• Treat them with kindness.

• Support and care for them.

• Always speak well of them, whether they are alive or not.

• Esteem them publicly and privately.

• Don’t forsake them.

3. Parents, in what ways are you showing honor to your kids? 

Colossians 3:21 says, “Fathers, do not provoke your children, lest they become discouraged.”

Let’s make sure we’re being good examples and not exasperating our children.

Do all that you can to make it easier for them to honor you.

Ray Fowler writes: “You can’t change your ancestors, but you can do something about your descendants!”

4. Adults, how are you honoring your aging parents today? Are you looking for ways to demonstrate care and concern?

 1 Timothy 5:8: “But if anyone does not provide for his relatives, and especially for members of his household, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.”

I’m reminded of the Grimm’s Fairy Tale about a family with two children and an elderly grandfather.

The grandfather could no longer eat neatly at the table. At first the parents rebuked him; then made him sit in the corner; eventually took away his knife, fork and spoon, placed food in a trough where he would eat with his fingers.

One day the dad saw his children playing outside with some wood, a hammer, and a saw.

“What are you building?” he asked.

They replied: “A trough for you when you get old!”

Are you taking care of your elderly parents?

What are you teaching your children right now about honoring the elderly?

5. In what ways are you showing honor to God, Your Father?

Is God weighty to you or do you regard Him as worthless? 

Psalm 29:2: “Ascribe to the Lord the glory due His name; worship the Lord in the splendor of His holiness.”

God blesses the people when their parents are honored, but the people are punished when they do not.

To honor is to hold someone in high regard or reverence.

The word honor does not mean agree with or even obey but does suggest in this context that a child should hold respect for their parent.

Now as we better understand the scriptural context and interpretation of the 5th commandment to honor thy mother and father, we can discern how this precept applies to modern-day life.

Ways we can appropriately honor our parents include:

Expressing Gratitude

Parents invest time and effort into raising children.

Those reasons alone are enough to show them gratitude for the sacrifices they make.

Parents provide shelter, food, clothing.

For every action they do in support of the child is itself a reason for appreciation.

Spending Time Together

When physically possible, children can and should get together with their parents.

This acknowledges their existence and places a level of importance upon the relationship.

If being together physically is not an option, calling a parent on the phone for a check-in is also beneficial. 

Serve

Another way to honor parents is to find ways to serve their wants and needs, much like parents perform on behalf of children.

To Honor or Not to Honor

Modern parenting is not equivalent to the parenting in biblical Jewish culture.

Children today learn differently and have certain responsibilities such as owning a cell phone, which was not true for past generations.

No matter the time, parents should always be honored.

One concern some followers and nonbelievers have with the commandment is the issue of bad parents, individuals who have abused their children by various means.

The Bible does not qualify which parents deserve honoring.

Additionally, Jesus mentions we are to love others as ourselves (Matthew 22:39) and to bless those who persecute us (Romans 12:14).

We, therefore, know that even when seemingly impossible, we should do our best to express love.

This commandment, however, does not advocate for putting ourselves in danger with bad parents.

Applying this commandment for children who have been abused may look different in terms of how they show their honoring.

Spending time together may be an impossibility but talking on the phone or writing a letter could be an option depending on the circumstance.

Sometimes we have to set boundaries in relationships, and whenever that is the case we can pray to God for wisdom, so that we may honor His commandment and honor our parents while keeping ourselves safe (James 1:5).

https://www.biblestudytools.com/bible-study/topical-studies/a-biblical-command-we-never-outgrow-honor-your-father-and-mother.html

In the name of God, our Father and God the Son and God the Holy Spirit,

Let us pray,

Father God thank you for your perfect fathering –

I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;

shepherded and nurtured; disciplined and challenged

so I can flourish in your purpose and plan for me

and bear my Father’s image more fully still.

Father God, thank you for your perfect example.

I praise you because you show all fathers how to love;

to shepherd and nurture; discipline and challenge

so their sons and daughters can flourish in this world as you have planned,

and carry your presence to all they meet.

Father God, bless all fathers today –

   with wisdom, with patience, with courage –

and above all with love for their children.

Father God, bless all children today –

   with openness to correction, with eagerness to learn –

and above all with love for their fathers.

Father God bless all who are fatherless today –

   surround them with godly men to teach, affirm and guide –

and above all to love with the love of a father – in your strength.

Amen.

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